Regrets | Norray

Chapter 4

(TW: blood, death)

I woke up to Emma standing above me.

"What the fuck-"

I heard Norman gasp and watched him pop out from behind Emma, covering her eyes and giving me a look of disbelief.

I chuckled and put a hand on my mouth to try to cover it, "You're so weird."

"ANYWAY," Norman sat on my bed, letting go of Emma, "Before you so RUDELY cursed at my girlfriend," I cringed, "We were gonna ask if you wanted to go to the movies with us. The three of us, like it used to be." He smiled.

The word "girlfriend" hit like a bullet, "Wouldn't want to interrupt your date." I teased, trying not to scream.

Norman chuckled, blushing a little, "It's not a date!"

"C'mon, Ray! ...We can even watch a horror movie if you want..." Emma sighed and shivered. She hated horror movies, but knew how much I liked them.

I knew exactly what this was about. My cutting. They wanted to keep a better eye on me, but I didn't need any eyes.

"No, I'm good." I insisted.

"What do you want to do then?" Norman laid back.

"Sleep." I laid back in the same position.

"All by yourself?" Emma whined.

"Yeah, that's sort of the plan. Kinda how sleeping works."

Eventually, they left to watch a movie on their not-date.

I stood up and went to my closet, pulling out a vertically long piece of wood that said "Do Not Disturb". I opened my door and hung the string on the doorknob facing the hallway. Norman got the sign for me one day because he knew how much I valued my "alone time". Yet another example of how amazing he is...

I shut the door, crawled back into bed, buried my face in the pillow, and screamed as hard as I could. Just the loud, muffled, incoherent nonsense of an outraged hopeless romantic.

EMMA!!!

I HATE HER!!! I HATE HER, I HATE HER, I HATE HER!!!! WHAT DOES NORMAN EVEN SEE IN HER?!

It's been so long that I've loved Norman that I completely forgot any friendship I had with Emma. I forgot how to stand her.

I don't know how long I'd been screaming, but all I knew was I only stopped when Norman and Emma got back. I had left my door slightly ajar, letting people know they could knock, but only for important matters.

And someone did- Emma.

"Ray, can I come in?"

I took a deep breath, "...Sure."

"How are you doing...?" She sat down slowly on my bed.

I sat up as well, staring at the floor. It took me a minute to comprehend her question and form a response, "I'm jealous."

She looked confused. "What? Of what?"

"You." I muttered, letting my hair shield me from her eyes.

"...what?"

"...I hate you..." I was barely audible.

"I can't hear you-"

"I hate you." This time I spoke in a loud clear voice, then throwing myself back on the bed and staring at the ceiling.

Some time passed before Emma responded, "W-what does that mean...?"

There was another pause, my anger rising. Suddenly, I leaped up and threw Emma to the ground, startling her. I grabbed a knife out from under my bed- one I used for cutting- and flew at Emma before either of us knew what was happening.

She didn't even scream.

What seemed like a few seconds later, I was covered with blood. Everything was covered with blood... Crimson smears were carved into the walls and the floor. Dull eyes were wide in shock and circled with red dots of varying lengths that had splattered upwards. I couldn't believe what I'd done. I stared at the lifeless body in front of me.  There was no saving her- she was dead. I murdered Emma.

I didn't mean to! I was just mad! I just- Oh, Emma... Tears poured down my face. I'm so sorry. Norman will kill me. My family will hate me. I can't be here. Without hesitation, I took the knife out of Emma's chest and plunged it into my torso. I gasped in pain, but still managed to take it out and stab into my flesh a second time. My vision blurred and darkened. I let the feeling of sleep overtake me. For once, I felt peaceful. Death was welcoming.