Body

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TW: Body image and so on.

I swear that I've watched my diet. Tried to perform perfectly. I have been consistent too, but looking into the mirror at Chads and Mindys place, I couldn't help but notice all of my imperfections. Especially dressed in the revealing nurse costume. No real nurse would ever dress like this, this short dress and kneehigh socks.

I could fit into it now, but my stomach still needs to shrink. My thighs are way too big. My arms as well. The longer I looked at myself, the more self concious I felt.

I shouldn't have bought this costume. I feel repulsive. My body is repulsive. Maybe Mindy has a better costume, one less revealing. One I can hide in.

"Chad?" A voice could be heard in the distance. The sound of the bedroom door opening made me jump and turn around.

A brown haired boy had walked in, like he was looking for something. Probably Chad. He was dressed in a cardboard box costume, I honestly wasn't sure what he was supposed to be.

"Chad, are you ready to-" He turned his head against me. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw me, for a split second his gaze dropped lower down, before quickly looking back up at my eyes. Then quickly looking up at the ceiling, while covering his eyes with his hand.

"I-I'm so sorry! I thought- It doesn't matter, but I thought Chad was here. Which he isn't. Because you're here. Changing." The brown haired carboard box boy said quickly. "Oh my, I walked in on you changing. I'm so sorry, I'm gonna leave."

He turned around, still not looking, and tried to find the door. He walked blindly into the wall instead.

"Shit, are you okay?" I asked, taking a step towards him. "I'm not naked or anything, you can look."

He stood still for a short moment. Then he slowly lifted away his hand, lowered his head and opened his eyes.

"I'm so, so sorry." He repeated, while scratching his neck. "I'm Ethan, Chads friend. We haven't met, right? I would have remembered you. Not, in like a creepy way, of course."

Ethan was digging his own grave even deeper, I couldn't help but smile at the nervous wreck.

"I'm Y/n, also friend of Chad and Mindy." I said, smiling.

"Y/n." Ethan repeated. He nodded against my costume. "You're also a nurse."

"Uhm, yeah, but I'm gonna need to change before we head to the party."

Ethan furrowed his eyebrows at that.

"Why?" He said, in some kind of disbelief. "Is it uncomfortable?"

"Oh, no, it's not. Actually really comfortable, but it's..." I took a breath, and crossed my arms, in an attempt to hide some of my midsection. "It's a bit, revealing, you know?"

Ethan nodded, he looked down at my body again.

"I don't think it's revealing enough." Ethans eyes widened when he realised what he had said. He slapped a hand over his forehead. "I took a shot before walking over to Chads place, I'm sorry again. I meant that it's not too revealing. I mean that you look great. Gorgeous, even. Like, really, really good. You're not the type of girl to even speak to me. I'm talking too much. I'm-"

"If you say 'sorry' one more time, I might have to stab you with my fake needle." I said, obviously joking. But Ethan quickly shut up, and nodded.

I walked back to the mirror, adjusting the costume a bit.

"Thanks, Ethan. You're really kind, but I... Honestly don't like my body enough for this costume. Maybe next year." I explained, staring at my perceived imperfections in the mirror.

I turned around to ask him to leave, so that I could change back. But when I turned around, I could see that he was looking at me like I was mentally insane and had just broken out of a mental hospital.

"How?" He asked, sounding genuinly surprised.

"You're really nice, but I still have some weight to loose before being able to wear this..."

"Please don't stab me with your fake needle, but you must be insane." His words stunned me.

"What?"

"Seriously, you look gorgeous. That costume is showing of your curves. You must seriously be insane if you can't see how good you look right now." Ethan said. I blinked at him, not used to hearing compliments like these.

Guys had always gone for my prettier friends. I don't blame them, I would have done the same. But I couldn't help but feel that if I looked different, my life would be as well.

But here Ethan was, a friend of Chad that I had never met before, telling me that he thought I looked... Good.

"If you like the costume, then you should wear it. Because you look great in it. Honestly."

"You must have low standards." I joked, trying to lighten the mood. Ethan took a step closer to me, smiling. His cheeks were red. Had he perhaps taken more than one shot before the party?

"I can't let you change costume, you look great in that one and I can't even believe that you don't see it."

Then we heard yelling from another room. Mindy, urging us to hurry up because we had to go to the party soon.

I smiled at Ethan, shaking my head. No,  I couldn't wear this. Ethan is probably just being nice. He probably feel sorry for me and wants to cheer me up.

Ethan looked like he was contemplating for a short moment, before making his decision.

"I'm sorry." He shyly said, making me furrow my eyebrows in confusion. Why is he apologising now?

Before I even had the chance to answer him, he quickly walked up to me, bent his knees and swiftly lifted me up, so I laid over his shoulder. I screamed, both from surprise but also worry.

"You're gonna hurt your back!"

"By carrying you? Please. I may not have as much muscles as Chad, but that was insulting." He said, but I had a hard time hearing him since I was on his shoulder.

Then he simply walked away with me. Like it was nothing. But it meant everything to me.

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