what now? | outerbanks

• eight •

JJ

        I rush up the stairs to the plane and quickly set Kie down on the ground, making sure not to trip while doing so. I put my ear over her mouth to check that she's still breathing, and she is. Thank God. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. The only thing I know about this kind of stuff is to do CPR when someone isn't breathing, but she is breathing, so I'm totally helpless. I place my hands on either side of the girls face and plant a gentle kiss in between her two eyebrows. Part of me expects her to suddenly wake up, like they do in movies. She doesn't. Instead, she lays there, her body lifeless. I take a step back from my girl and sit in one of the airplane seats closest to where she lays. I say a simple prayer in my head, one that I haven't said in years. I used to pray a lot more, but look where that got me. I never really know what I believe anymore, or if I believe anything, at that. There's one thing I do know, though: I love her.

Pope

Kie, my first love. I really do think I loved her, and part of me likes to think she loved me too. I like where I'm at now, and I'd never change what I have with Cleo, but nothing will ever change how I feel about Kie. I've loved her since I've met her, in more ways than once. She was a sister to me first and that's what she is now, my Pogue sister. We're Pogues- we love each other more than life. So here I am, walking through the sticky, humid jungle at half a pace faster than the rest of the pack needing to make it back in time to help her. I know I can help, and so does everyone else; I risked my scholarship for this, I may as well use my knowledge for something helpful.

"Pope!" I hear from behind me, it's Sarah. I keep my head forward and ignore the girl.

"Hey, Pope! Listen!" My name is called again, but this time it's my dad. Having put him through enough already, I turn around.

"What?!"

"Slow down, by God you're going at like 50 an hour. Better hope you don't tear holes in those shoes, boy."

"With this gold I'll be getting some new ones in no time anyway. Plus, I have to get to Kie." Our of the corner of my eye, I see Cleo share a concerned look with Sarah, and I can't decipher what she means by it. I want to say something, to ask if she's okay, but I don't. Instead, I keep quiet and keep walking.

Somewhere along the way, not too much later, Sarah announces that there should only be a couple minutes left until we're back at the plane. In that same span of time, Cleo ends up at my left side. It takes me a second to realize that she's waiting for me to say something, but I do eventually.

"Hey." I make sure we're a bit ahead of everyone else before starting though.

        "Hi." She waits a couple seconds, looking up at the sky and then back down at her feet, before speaking again. "Um, what is this?"

        "What is what?" I know what she's talking about.

        "You know what I mean." I knew she would know. "Us? This?"

        "Oh, yeah. Um- What do you want it to be."

        "I don't know, I just, I thought we were more and I would like to be more but the way you talked about Kie earlier, and you- you got that look in your eyes- I just... I don't know. It's probably stupid, never mind."

        "Cleo. I pick you over Kie, I do. I used to think Kie was it for me, but she wasn't. It's you, Cleo, it's you. We're still family, yeah, so I still love her, but not like you." The girl doesn't answer for a bit, and I'm trying to tell if I said something wrong. I don't think I did, until I remember that I just implied that I love her. I mean, I do, but I'm scared she'll take it the wrong way. Instead, she plants a kiss on my cheek before taking her spot next to Sarah. When I look behind me, I see the girls poorly hide their high-five, and I'm left with a sweet small on my face.

        I love her.

John B.

Finally I have my girl's hand in mine again, and I feel whole. Nothing in life is perfect right now, but I have her. I couldn't care less about the gold, really, as long as I can be with her forever. I look to my left, where Sarah stands, and simply smile. She looks back and smiles as well, looking into my eyes. I can tell her smile isn't as big as it could be, and I don't blame her. The two of us don't say anything, but we know what we're both thinking: it'll be alright.

new chapter!!!! sorry i've been gone for literally forever!! i've been the BUSIEST!!!! two weeks ago i was on vacation to see taylor swift (which was INCREDIBLE) and then last week i was booked with auditions and rehearsals! but i'm back now 🥳🥳🥳 this chapter is definitely a tad shorter than usual, but i just really wanted to get something out for you guys! also! i'm so glad i got to write from some new perspectives!

as always, keep voting and commenting! also share with your friends it's helps tremendously! (also, would any of you be interested in a playlist for this book??? pls let me know ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥)

thanks again, i love you all so much

xoxo sam