Years Untold

Chapter 2

Before i take you further into this story, i would like to introduce myself.
I'm Ashra. A 12th pass out currently searching for colleges to get her ass in despite being unsure of what subject to opt for.
You might be wandering why an 18 year old might be needing the services of a psychiatrist for or why didn't she write her 'title' while addressing her in the first place? I'll be damned if i donot answer these questions.
So, let me begin with the 'title' part.
I live in a country that claims to be secular, but little do you know about the civilians who judge you based on your title.
They say, "eyes are the window to one's soul." It's the same case with a title. People come to know which religion you belong to, which caste you're entitled to, which tribe you're born in, and the list goes on. I'm a Hindu. Of course. But it's a 'thing' about me; i like to manipulate people. I like telling only my name so as to make them drum hammers on their brains in thinking what might be the word tailing my name.
My mother is not a fan of this obsession of mine. Last time I did that, she nudged me to just spit my full name out. I'm a little stubborn, to be specific. I didn't.
The second question in concern is why I went to a psychiatrist.
"Shit...it's a psychotherapist, goddamn Ashr-"
"yes, yes i know." I shout in the air. Sorry, that's my mother's best friend calling.
"You should be careful before writing something down. Just do some research. You can't be writing an entire story without knowing the difference betwe-"
"shhh i know. I'm sorry!!" I jump up straight on my feet and bolt into the other room and stumble onto the bed flat on my stomach.
"Here may shall i have some peace she-devil?. Please?"
His name is Ari and we call him Ari. There's nothing much to note about him, he just seems to have a lot of knowledge about things. He loves doing research and it'll be a little superficial on my part not to admit that it benefits me too.
I just don't acknowledge it to him or otherwise he will bloat with all that laud. He's already add on some extra flab lately.
He's a man with average stature with a countenance resembling a wolf. He'd have been an attractive of a man if he wasn't bald in the back.
But he seems not to care about it much. He's an optimist, and that's what i like about him.
    It's not less than a week ago, he explained to me the difference between a 'psychiatrist' and a 'psychotherapist'. That a person has to do MBBS to become a psychiatrist and the latter doesn't. So, the person I was claiming as my psychiatrist would be my psychotherapist.
"Hushh...these words are so long, i can't be repeating these in every sentence i write!"
‌I lay the pen and my journal down as i twist my body and lie numb as i face the ceiling directly above me. I squeeze my eyes shut tending to feel my body flying free in the air.
"I don't feel good..i need to.." i rush to the sink covering my mouth which is now filled with a sour taste...