The Cascading Waves of Caden Lee

31

SCARLETT PARKER

Its been two weeks since I saw those pills in Caden's pocket. Every-time I see him, the image of that baggy materializes in my mind and stops me short of any word I was ever gonna say.

He's none-the-wiser, and in fact, he seems to be happier than ever in my presence. I was worried he would somehow find out that I knew, and things would get messy, but any trace of the truth I try to find in his eyes isn't there.

He just looks like Caden.

I don't know what I was expecting. Sunken eyes, shallow cheekbones, grey-tinged skin? It's what I know from the past; the sight of him steadily deteriorating into the dirt. Or the velvet of his thousand-dollar casket. His mind was nuclear but his body was pollution.

He looks fine. Great, even.

Which is why the possibility of those few pills just being recreational pop into my mind. Some people can control themselves; they're all wild hair and sharp smiles. Not afraid of the fun many never grew into. Shades covering their eyes indoors; limitless energy and flashing lights. Hanging jaws bitten onto pacifiers.

They can take the drug, enjoy it, and stop.

It's a gift not many have, but i'm sure he's just curing his curiosity. Trying something out. If his tanned skin and bright eyes mean anything.

Coincidentally, he texts me, "Are u free Friday night?" It's Thursday now. I try to think if I've somehow forgotten any plans for tomorrow, but come up blank.

"No, why??" I type out, sending only seconds after.

"Someone from the team is throwing a house party. Wanna come?"

Honestly, I've never been one for parties really. They're too loud, and stuffy, and the music booms through the speakers so loud that your ears ring for days afterwards.

But I wanna see him, so I say, "what's the address?"

He sends it; only 15 minutes away from my house. That's fine. It'll be okay. I can just head over and hang out with him and the party will be fun.

"yeah i'll go! anyone picking up or do i drive myself?"

He responds, saying, "u drinking or no??"

Am I? I guess it could give me courage, but I don't need to if we don't have a designated driver or something.

A few minutes after I had sent a message consisting of, "depends..is everyone else drinking cause if we need a DD I can be it."
He texts back saying, "i'll prob be drinking if thats ok with u? u don't gotta be the DD we could send an uber or smthn??"

"idk if i can force my drunk self to order an uber at 2 am lmao"

"me neither...one time i jumped off the roof of this dudes house WHILE drunk and then PUKED everywhere when I was 14.."

And then, "I got in so much trouble for drinking."

My jaw drops, eyes nearly bulging as I send back an alerted, "you jumped off the ROOF? while drunk? at 14?!"