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I will never stop loving you. I can never.
Maybe It will hurt less to see you with someone knowing how special I was to you but I still didn't get to stand beside you, as yours. Maybe I won't be laying down and dream of us together. Maybe I will smile at you when we don't talk for months and not breakdown to not have you close for more than a day. Maybe there will be someone in my life too.
But it won't be you. No one can be you. It's you, and always will be. First person I can say I really loved. Someone I wanted more than anything. Someone who will always be the one I actually loved.
I will surely miss the old us, the old times. Where I did not have any worries unless we fought. Where I was smiling ears to eat everyday just because of a text. Where I actually felt something, where I could feel my heart skip a beat just from your laugh. The laugh I will always adore.
I may not picture us or want us together. I will be glad to walk away from the old us the stupid us, attached to each other. But nothing can replace what you made me feel, no one can.
It's painful when I have the realisation the days of spamming you before sleep, us with those corny conversations and laughing on the phone, video calling whenever we wake up, having someone to cry to and call whenever I can, those days are gone. But the time I spent with you will always be the most beautiful past, painful but most cherished. My favourite memories.
You were my first love now I'm afraid you will be my last.
I am ready to say goodbye to us. I never thought this day would come. I never thought we won't be back together like before even after our worst fights. I never thought we would change. I love you, I loved you and I always will.
