what they never knew

a one shot - maddie's pov

I seemed normal.

I got good grades, and I was well-liked by my teachers and peers. I had many friends, and I was always nice to everyone. I was a bit of a perfectionist, but I was nice and caring. I was "lovable", according to my best friend, Kendall.

But there was a side that they never knew.

I was, what some people might call, a moon. I mostly only showed one side of myself, and it was always my good side. Occasionally, I would show my other side, comparing to a full moon, but it was rarely ever. I put on a mask, as if my best friend didn't constantly fantasize over the boy that I liked. I masked the fact that I was constantly sad. I masked the fact that I even liked my best friend's crush, just so she could be happy. I constantly feel like I can't share anything with Kendall because I am so afraid that I will hurt her feelings.

But things have gone terribly wrong, and now I am the one broken. I'm the one that is never asked if they're okay, because their mask of happiness fooled everyone, even those who feel as if they cannot be fooled by anything. I desperately hoped that my mask would convince myself. I wanted to be fooled. I wanted to be happy, fake or not.

I knew that everyone would call me an attention freak. "Maddie Ziegler is always happy," they'd think. They would think that I wanted everyone's attention. I always believe that it is better for me to just bottle it up. I never let my feelings show, and it really made me worse. Everyday, I was fine, I guess, until one particular Tuesday.

It was April 14th, 2015, and I woke up feeling extra excited.

It was his birthday. The Lucas Triana's birthday. The boy that I have had a crush on since the third grade. He is also the boy that Kendall now has a crush on.

Yes, Kendall is my best friend, but she is also the reason that these feelings are building up inside of me like legos.

I hopped out of bed, brushing my teeth and putting on a cute but comfortable outfit. I wore a light pink tank top and a creme colored cardigan. I put on a pair of jean capris. I added lipgloss, and a touch of eyeliner. I raced downstairs, and grabbed my backpack, bidding my mom goodbye as I left out the door, to the bus stop.

On my way there, I saw Kendall kissing somebody. Lucas.

My heart fell, and tears threatened to spill. But no, I would let her have this. I will let her have what I have wanted for four years, she can have it. She caught my eye, and I gave her a thumbs up, forcing a smile.

And in that moment, I realized that there were a lot of things that they didn't know. They didn't know that I cried myself to sleep because my parents always put me down and tell me that I'm worthless. They didn't know that I had bruises all over me from my sister, pushing me into walls and down the stairs. They didn't know that I had a massive crush on Lucas, and they definitely didn't that I wanted the little "Kucas/Lendall" to be my own.

And at this moment, I wish I would've showed them my true self.

There is a lot of things that they never knew.

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end of one shot!!!!

thanks for reading, i love you guys !!!!!!!!!