(It's Agony Without You)
Heeseung's POV:
I was so close.
She was just beneath my fingertips but my dumbass started too soon. She was probably not ready, and judging the way she almost crumbled in front of me angered me.
Whatever she feeling, whatever she's going through, I want to end it. I want her to feel the most comfortable and happiest person alive.
But I couldn't contain the feeling of adrenaline and desperation when I saw her there, looking as beautiful as ever. I needed to convey how I felt all these months without her. How much I loved her and wanted her with me again.
I watched her leave from the glass window, looking down at the concrete path as I bit the inside of my cheek. I found myself roughly gripping the fabric of my trench coat as I leaned back against my chair, sighing.
I pressed my lips together, feeling stupidity wash over me as I decided to stop my antics for a bit, giving her the time she needed. Even though it will be painfully difficult to perform.
I exited the bakery and headed back to campus, controlling myself to not wonder where Saero's whereabouts were even though I heavily wanted to see her again after so long.
Seeing her there made me feel guilty in a way. After we broke up, or, after she broke up with me. We had a major argument beforehand. It was probably not healthy to have that as the last thing to do but I couldn't help but want to fight for her.
Necessarily it wasn't an argument of fighting with her, but more for her, to get her back. I will admit, I flipped out and said things that I wouldn't normally say. And looking back on it now, I realized how ignorant I might have been.
But it was also hard on my part, there were things I didn't understand and knew, and her keeping it to herself impacted me a lot.
It frustrated me and saddened that she had to bear all that pain on her own. And I've realized how much of a ignorant person I become looking back at our conversation.
Maybe I was too desperate, not thinking properly beforehand. I had put myself first before her and now she has fallen out of my grasp.
And I couldn't get her again.
YOU ARE READING
𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋; lee heeseung
Fanfiction❝ I've written goddamn songs about you, if that isn't enough to prove how much I love you. Then run away from me again and I'll show you how much I can love you harder than the first. ❞ - university au in where Saero traverses life with a child whos...
