this is how it starts || m.h

19) drowning

Matty's fingers were tracing small circles on my thigh as we laid in bed together, his eyes half open as he smiled at me. We'd been sleeping in the same bed like this since the first night he knocked on my door, and I was growing far too used to his company at night.

"Wouldn't you prefer to sleep in your own bed?" I asked him after a moment, conscious of the fact that there was never much space when we slept together.

"No," he answered, shaking his head. "I like sleeping with you, in more ways than one."

"Okay, then." I smiled, before leaning closer to press a kiss to his lips.

As I brought a hand up to rest against his face, I suddenly felt like I was drowning, emotion forcing its way up my throat.

When this all started, I didn't really know what to expect. But I certainly didn't expect to be here, with Matty's hand between my thighs, his lips moving tenderly with mine.

I think the closest I had ever come to loving someone was when I found Addie. She was my best friend, and the only person I'd ever managed to form a genuine connection with.

And then I found Matty.

I woke up to him sleeping beside me, my head pounding and the taste of alcohol still lingering on my tongue. And then a few days later, I found myself leaving my shared flat to join him on his tour. This man that I barely knew, yet I would trust with my life.

I sometimes wonder if I made the right decision running away with him. I wasn't in love with him or anything, but I think I was coming pretty close.

"Matty." I sighed, my fingers tangled in his hair as he dragged his lips down my throat. "What's going to happen─after tour?"

"What do you mean?"

"Will we still see each other?"

He pulled back then, staring down at me in amusement. "Of course we will. I'm not just going to drop you the second we get back to London."

"Aren't you?"

"No. I like you, Serena, okay? I like being around you."

I smiled. "I like you too."