The Kids Aren't Alright

***

"Bu' Ma, my entire life is here," Jack had cried, talking about Mark mainly. Hot tears seemed to eat at his features as he sobbed grossly, his mother not listening to him as he begged to stay with family in the area.

"It's for the best, Jack, I'm sorry," she had said. But he knew she wasn't sorry as her son tried to pour his heart out and beg. It was useless. He wouldn't win. Ever. Not even if he screamed and cursed his parents names. They must've known about his love. And for that, Jack was angry. However it hurt like a thousand stars cutting into his chest as his love for Mark was now forbidden.

When you leave a home for the first time, it seems as if your world is crumbling around you. If you're in love, the world is crumbling and you start to fall a great distance as you drown beneath the surface of what once was. If you're too scared to say anything, your heart feels as if someone has stabbed it and started twisting the knife within your chest. And that's exactly how Jack was feeling on that last day. However, what he didn't know was that in Mark's mind, the same thoughts were recurring.

He doesn't see a point to continue to argue with his mom. She made it clear that her decision is final. So he ran to his room, tears still pouring out of his eyes. He slammed his bedroom door shut, jumped onto his bed and buried his head into his pillow, his cries and screams being muffled out.

Mark had been told the news by his own mother, and knew today was the last day for Jack to live anywhere near him as he slowly walked to the door, looking at it defeated. Just tell Jack you love him already.

"But I don't know if he even loves me back," he said, in between sniffles as tears start to develop in his eyes. "I don't want to ruin our friendship and even if the feelings were mutual, which I doubt, I'm still gonna end up alone."

Jack was coming down with suitcases and boxes, the last of his things out of his room except for a single box, newspaper blankets caressing the objects inside as the outside wrapping hugged it tightly, the bow holding it all together although with the looseness of the knot, it threatened to fall apart. Just like Jack's heart the second he opened the door to see Mark there. "Hey..."

"Hey..." he repeated back in the same monotone voice. He wanted to jump on him and give Jack the biggest hug of his life, but he felt like his feet were stuck in cement and didn't move a single muscle. Maybe coming here was such a bad idea, he thought to himself. He desperately wanted to tell Jack how he felt about him, how much he loves him, how much he just wants to kiss him now, even though he knows it's really cliche at this moment, but he can't blurt it out as he felt his stomach twist tighter in knots.

Jack couldn't even make eye contact, scared of the tears within them spilling out. Along with the truth of why he was so hurt by leaving. "So...I guess this is it, isn't it? This is the end..." Saying the words aloud made the heaviness added to the worse, as if his throat couldn't possibly hold the power of the words he said. The end when there was never a beginning. Those are the worse endings.

"Yeah..." was all Mark can say. It's now or never, Mark thought to himself. He doesn't know what would hurt more; telling Jack how he really feels about him and, possibly getting rejected or maybe not get rejected, but either way, it will hurt like hell. But also not telling him and never knowing if Jack has mutual feelings makes his heart ache as well. "Jack I..."

"Jack, can you start bringing boxes out and loading them into the moving truck?" Jack's mom interrupted as Mark cursed himself, knowing that his one chance was now ruined.

Jack sighed. "Ya mind helpin' me a bit?" He asked softly, looking into Mark's eyes sadly. He didn't want this to end. But then again, it had never really began, had it?

"I guess I should make myself useful while I'm here." he shrugged as Jack let him inside his house and made their way into Jack's room.

All the times he came to visit, all the sleepovers they had when they were younger, staying up and playing video games until the sun was rising. All the memories came rushing into Mark's mind once he saw the emptiness that is Jack's room. Things aren't gonna be the same anymore. No more video game sessions, no more sneaking in the kitchen at night and raiding the fridge while his parents were sleeping. Right now, he feels like grabbing Jack's hand and just run away.

"It's empty now... I've never seen my room like this, but it's not mine anymore, huh?" Jack whispered, tearing up. "It's goin' ta just be someone else's... someone else's room. With the outlet that shorts out 'nd the torn up rug 'nd-" at that point, Jack was sobbing.

Jack never cried with Mark nearby, but he never seemed to need the tears. He was a happy kid with a happy childhood and almost no struggle for anything. But now things had changed enough for those tears to form rivers of misery down his face, to allow the flooding waters within his eyes to break free from captivity. Jack needed someone to cling to, Mark being the closest as he buried his face against his neck.

Mark felt his heart jump a little once Jack clung on to him until he wrapped his arms around his waist and, slowly, rocked him side to side.

"Everything is gonna be okay," Mark spoke softly, even though it was a lie. Nothing is gonna be okay. His best friend is moving away and he's gonna end up alone. They always did everything together. Jack was pretty much his partner in crime but now he's being taken away. "I-I know it won't be the same, but we can always Skype each other. Just because you're moving, that doesn't mean that we can't talk ever again."

"Ya don' understand, I can't say it, I can't say what I need ta say, I don' know how ta say it so ya won' hate me! I need you to stay with me!" Jack sobbed, trembling against Mark.

"I won't hate you," Mark said as he began to rub Jack's back. "I will never hate you. You're my best friend and I need you too. Yes, it sucks that you're moving away, but I will never stop talking to you."

"Alright, boys, you gotta bring down the last-oh," Jack's mom stopped by his, what used to be, his bedroom door and both boys quickly separated from each other once they heard her voice. "Sorry to interrupt you guys," she said, feeling guilty interrupting the boys emotional moment. "But we're almost done taking everything out. You just need to bring the last of your stuff outside," she spoke softly.

"Yeah, okay," Jack responded making his way to one of the boxes that was on the floor as his mom left them alone again. Mark followed, but couldn't help but wonder what Jack meant when he said he can't tell him.

Jack walked out with a box of his memories, everything that was on his walls, all his pictures, several of them with Mark. He looked down into it, not watching where he was going as he nearly tripped down the stairs from the one faulty step, but instead of a fall, a pair of strong arms were around his torso.

"I won't let you fall, Jack," Mark murmured as Jack leaned into the embrace. It was nice and warm in his arms, like he belonged there, not realizing Mark was holding on tighter to him.

"I've already fallen," Jack mumbled softly, looking down at himself. He had fallen for Mark, but he didn't think Mark heard the comment he made as he moved to continue down the stairs.

Mark just gave him a sad smile, walking with Jack outside to bring the last of his things out to the truck. That's when the realization finally hit him that Jack was leaving, that he won't see him ever again, and that's when a single tear slid down his cheek.

"I'm gonna miss you," Mark spoke softly. "But I won't forget about you if you don't forget about me."

"I could never forget ya, Mark," Jack said lightly, moving to connect their lips, but getting too scared, making it into a hug. If only he had been brave enough as he got into the moving van. The van started, leaving Mark speechless as he watched it drive away, staying there until he could no longer see the truck. Jack did the same as he let his tears glide down. He was so sorry he didn't take the chance he had. He didn't know that there were two broken hearts in this situation. He thought it was only one.