The Meaning of Family

Getting There

As the days went on, Ava adjusted more to the routine of school and home, though she didn't like it much. She did like Faith and Joey, so that helped her a lot. And it helped Hailey and Jay's peace of mind knowing Ava had other kids she was interacting with.

They were on week two of school, and it was Jay's turn to do drop off and early pick up. Unfortunately, as soon as he pulled up to the daycare on Monday, Ava started crying, asking to go home. She didn't really want to do this again, even if she did have friends now.

"I know, baby. Just 5 more days, try for 5 more days," Ava nodded but kept crying. Jay walked around, trying to calm the little girl, before he went inside and was able to get Ava to go to her teacher so he could leave. He felt terrible that she was still crying when he left, but they had a case.

Ava did great at school once she settled down, but she was very attached to Jay when he picked her up and they ended up napping together on the couch for a couple of hours before Jay took her to a therapy appointment.

When they left, Ava was quiet and ready for her bath and dinner. It had been a long Monday for her. Jay got her bathed and in pajamas before Hailey came home and Ava immediately attached herself to her sister while Jay made dinner, talking a little bit about her day. After they ate, she fell asleep on the couch.

The next day went better, she didn't cry much at drop off and was happy when Jay picked her up. She actually said she had fun, and Jay took her to the park after her nap because it wasn't too hot and she wanted to go play. It was definitely an improvement because Ava typically didn't want to do anything after school, she just wanted to be with Hailey and Jay and stay home.

The rest of the week, Ava began to do even better. She stopped crying at drop off, making that process much easier on herself, Jay, and her teacher. She was also initiating games with her new best friends and acting sillier and more open at school. They were definitely getting there with her separation anxiety.

Soon, they'd made it through Ava's second week of school, and now they had to be prepared for her first week of full days, which Hailey and Jay, at that moment, were more nervous about than Ava. Although, they weren't 100% sure Ava understood what would be happening on Monday. They spent the weekend at a pool with Will, Nat, and Owen one day and at home the next.

Monday came and Ava went to school just fine, only a couple of tears were shed when Hailey explained she would be taking her nap and school then playing there afterwards. They figured she would be alright, somewhat.

Ava was not fine with it the first day. Lunch time passed and she went up to Miss Allison. "Whewe Haiwey and Jay?" She asked, holding her bunny and elephant to her chest. She was ready to go home.

"They're coming later today, Ava. After nap and more play time. Hailey said she talked to you about it," Allison got down to Ava's level as she spoke.

Ava shook her head, eyes welling up with tears. "No. No, I wanna go home and nap," Ava whimpered, a few tears slipping down her cheeks. She did not want to nap there.

"I know, honey, but we need to try and do this today. Hailey said she's going to try to come fast after your nap, but we need to try and sleep today. Or stay on your mat quietly and rest," Allison tried but Ava shook her head and began to sob, thumb moving to her mouth.

"Wanna go home!" She wailed, voice muffled around her thumd as her face pressed into her bunny and elephant. "Pwease!"

It broke Allison's heart, but she knew going home wasn't really an option for Ava and that part of helping Ava with her anxiety involved having her experience it and see that something would always come and pick her up at the end of the day.

"Let's take a deep breath, sweet girl. Can you show me how you do that for me?" It took a few tries, but Ava took a deep breath. "Good job. Now, how about we get your pretty nap mat out and we put it by Faith's mat. I want you to try to sleep, but if you can't, then you can sit with me and I'll read you a book or two. I promise Hailey or Jay will come pick you up in a few hours. We can even create a count down once nap time is over. What do you think?"

Ava stood there crying for a minute or so before she nodded, trying to be brave. She really didn't want to do this. Allison made sure she changed into a pullup and helped her get settled (ish) on her nap mat. The teacher hated that the little girl was so distressed and sent a message to Hailey and Jay in the app to let them know Ava was having a hard time but was trying to nap.

Unfortunately, Ava only slept 40 minutes of the hour and a half before she woke up, immediately growing upset because she was wet. "What's the matter, Ava?" Miss Allison asked, immediately leading the small girl away from the other kids that were still asleep.

"Wet," she murmured, very sad, but her teacher helped get her changed then, with Ava's permission, lifted her up and held her as she walked around. It helped to calm Ava down, but the toddler didn't relax until she got home that evening and sobbed her heart out the next morning at drop off, not wanting to stay a whole day.

Hailey ended up crying the whole drive to work, Jay noticing when she got there. "She cried so hard."

"Hopefully she'll level out after this week," Jay sighed, hugging his wife.

"If she doesn't, I'm not sure what to do. She had such a hard afternoon yesterday and was so hard for her. I don't want her to struggle so much," Hailey huffed, very worried.

"What if we try something weighted for her to use during her nap. I saw this kids weighted swan online and thought it may be good for her. Amazon can have it to us by morning," Jay suggested, wanting to find something for Ava because it seemed like nap time was the greatest cause of her distress.

"I'll try anything for her, order it," Hailey kissed Jay before going to get started on work.

Ava made it through the day, barely. She had one breakdown and Faith and even Joey, who was very energetic, sat with her while she cried it out and even got her to go back to playing. When Hailey heard about that, she made a mental note to reach out to the both kids' moms and thank them for having such incredible kids. Ava clung to Hailey most of the evening after school and ended up in bed with Jay and Hailey all night.

However, she didn't cry at school the next day and with her new weighted swan, she actually slept more than 30-45 minutes during nap time. Progress, and by Friday, she came home with a smile on her face.

Over the next two weeks, Ava started to do better with school and being gone all day, even getting a little excited about going each day because she loved playing with her little friends. It made Hailey and Jay happy that every day wasn't filled with tears and panic, she only cried hysterically once during her third week of full days and ended up having a panic attack because of a bad storm that blew through, so Jay went and got her about an hour early, but other than that, she did good. They were making a lot of progress.