Siren's Song [h.s.]

04

The week rolled around to an end. Oceana and I spent all of Saturday exploring the town and on Sunday we went to a more public beach to hang out before school began on Monday. Oceana wasn't starting college until a week later, and she would spend this week moving into her dorm and preparing.

Even though we have vastly different interests, it was nice to spend some time with my older sister. When we were at the beach we wandered off from the public area and came across some tide pools. Oceana talked to me about the different plants and animals in it, showing me various starfish and anemones. For the first time in a while, I listened to her in interest.

Science never interested me but hearing her talk so passionately about it made me realize how much she really loved learning about it and her interest in it rubbed off on me too. I took some pictures of the wildlife to paint later, and eventually the sun started to set.

We sat on an empty and quiet part of the beach, watching the waves lap calmly below the pink and orange skies. We were both lost in our own thoughts by then, but it was far from uncomfortable. The sounds of the ocean were easy to get lost in.

"You know, I know you're not as passionate as I am when it comes to science, but I think we both love the ocean the same, even if we express it differently," Oceana said, not quite breaking the calm atmosphere surrounding us.

I continued to stare at the waves, taking in her words. I nodded in agreement as I thought about it.

While my sister loses herself in the biology of it all, I admire it for its beauty and artistic side of it. Hell, whenever I'm bored or need an escape from it all the first thing I do is run to the beach. It's my safe space. I have countless paintings and drawings of aquatic landscapes and beaches and sea life. It's always been my favorite thing to draw.

I turn my head to look at Oceana, the rose gold sunset reflects in her dark hair and creates a purple illusion on her aquamarine eyes as she lies on the sand. One of her hands acts as a pillow for her head while the other rests on her stomach. Her white sunglasses are perched on top of her head since the sun has begun to set ages ago.

I lean on my elbows with my legs stretched out in front of me, watching my sister who's staring at the California sky in thought. I look back out at the ocean and try to remember this moment as much as I can and lock it away into my core memory.

Tomorrow when I start school, everything is going to be so much more different. And when Oceana leaves for college it's going to be much more lonely. Mom and Dad already aren't around that often because of their job, so I guess it'll just be me around. Maybe I can convince my parents to get me a pet to keep me occupied.

The sun sets even lower beyond the horizon, and Oceana and I finally start our walk back to her car. She lets me play music on the drive back to our house. I crank up the volume as my sister opens the roof of her convertible and we laugh as we sing to our favorite pop songs.

I lean back in my seat, feeling the breeze on my face and in my hair, just enjoying the moment. Maybe later I'll try to paint the feeling.

When we get home, I run past my parents going through papers in the study, and head straight upstairs to my room. It's around nine at night now, and I change into my PJs and do my nightly routine before writing a quick journal entry and going to bed an hour later.

It was quite difficult for me to fall asleep, thoughts about me being the new girl consumed my mind and gave me anxiety but I kept telling myself to not worry about it and just face it all tomorrow.

After an hour of tossing and turning, I grab my phone that's charging on my nightstand and take out the charger, replacing it with my earphones. I squint at my phone even after I dimmed the brightness, scrolling through my many playlists on Spotify until I find the one I made a couple of months ago to help me sleep. I put in my earbuds and squeeze the stuffed bunny that I've had since I was little, and focus my screaming thoughts on the music instead, eventually falling asleep.