A dump of those "before i close my eyes to sleep" thoughts
Join me as we laugh, cry, and maybe look at nothing as I may never have the same motivation to write on here as when I did for the first time (a.k.a now). This may end up all angsty or lovey...
It all felt so unreal, marrying the guy who once wouldn't bat an eye at me (as if I would too >:(( ), how could this all be real? Me, walking down the aisle, a beautiful flower bouquet in my hand covered with a lace-like elegant glove while wearing the prettiest dress every girl would dream of having.
I had it all, I had the looks, the brains, the wealth, the personality, and all those but I've always felt like something was missing, and I guess you really have to trust your gut sometimes because I was right. Something was missing and I finally found it. It's been exactly 3000 days since I found my missing piece.
It was a rainy Sunday. On the twelfth of April in 2015, how could I forget? Forget how I forgot my umbrella at home before going to the convenience store which led to some random tall guy who looked like one of those kdrama guys I watch on tv, to call me "stupid" because I attempted to take the table cloth on one of the tables just to have something to cover my head. But still, you took your umbrella and gave it to me, you must've already fallen for me that time huh? That was the day, the exact day when I found my missing piece, under the rain. You still had to watch over the store that time yet you chose to take me home as you didn't trust me enough with your umbrella. Or was it that you didn't trust the umbrella with me? To be honest, I felt annoyed because you completely ruin my plan. My plan to take a glimpse of you on another day when I'll give you back the umbrella but it's fine, the convenience store you work at is open 24 hours for a reason ;).
June 29, 2023,
The day that my puzzle will finally be completed, today. Down the aisle, you waited, wearing a white suit to contrast the black suit that the other guys at the wedding wore. You didn't really have to wear white though because right at this moment, you shined so much, too much. I know you don't like compliments as you have no clue on how to respond to them but trust me, you don't have to respond to this but I hope you know that you look really dashing in that suit and in everything else you wear. Theres about a hundred people in the crowd yet my eyes are set on one person and it's you.
Tears, tears started to flow down your cheeks as you were obviously trying to hide them. I've known you for so long and you've never cried, never shed a tear in front of others. But right at that moment, your eyes were filled with gloss and I could almost see my reflection in them. It's always me who cries but now, it's you. You looked at me so dearly, I could melt right at this moment. I've always blabbered about how I wouldn't be able to hold my tears once I get married and you've always told me about how you wish you could cry in my place, and right at this very moment, you fulfilled that.
Those cat-like eyes of yours, looking into mine, and all I see is what awaits me, what awaits us. All I see is my life without you... I see nothing. They say that imagination is endless yet why is it impossible for me to imagine my life without you?
As I inched closer, the image of you becomes more and more blurry and translucent. The more I walked, the more you started to feel less real and more of an illusion. Something that's all in my head. You vanished but water droplets still fell down to the ground. You were gone but your tears stayed.
I looked up, welcomed by rain dripping down and that's when reality dawned upon me.
What made you cry, my Sky? I hope you're not sad right now, I hope you're feeling happy up there, happy tears only, my love. If I could choose between living and being able to hug you right now, I'd come there to give you a hug. I know how much you anticipated for this day, how you talked to your friends all about it. How you invited everyone you could possibly could to witness this day.
But there's nothing we can do now, there's no turning back in time no matter how much I wanted to. By the beach was where we were supposed to have the best time of our life, where I am right now was where it could've all happened, could HAVE, never will anymore. Thank you for keeping your promise, Sky. Thank you for always being here with me.
'The rain', is where it all happened. The rain is what witnessed our first meeting and the last. And I will forever be thankful for that.
If it weren't for the rain, I would've never found the missing piece to my life.
But from now on, I'll probably start to hate the rain just as much as I hate seeing you cry.
And If weren't for the rain, I would've never realized how my missing piece is now gone. Now, the missing in 'missing piece' doesn't mean something that I have to find anymore, it now means something that I've found but will forever be gone.
In every lifetime, I will search for you.
" I will forever be missing you, my missing piece, My Sky. ", the sand on the beach read as the rain and beach, hand in hand started to wash away the sand. And just like you, what I wrote on the sand, faded away.
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✉ from kel
HI SORRY IF THIS WAS A LIL EH HSDHAHSDHASH I JUST FINISHED WHEN I FLY TOWARDS YOU!!! the wedding scene inspired me to write this but like tragic version hehehehehe. Btw, first person pov's name here is "rain" :>. Sky loves Rain but now Rain hates the rain because it took away her Sky from her :(( YIEHAHDAHSDHASHDGOODNIGHT !!! SEE U WHEN I SEE U LOL
