Broken Memories

Presence

Here I stand ready to face.

yet behind my eyes yearning to hide

when overwhelm consumes the fight is lost?

pushing and fighting slowly weaving forward

the words begin to scatter.

I turn to face.

I push to hide.

can I not move?

I cannot move. 

These moments leading up I fought the war.

Seconds too late I lose to myself.

falling inside once again

the efforts to stay present confounded with the dual awareness.

the fallacy

the lies

the presence

the fear

the inconsistency

the extremes

the confusion 

the failure of thought

moments slip and fade.

wishing for the chance to return 

feeling like oneself again

yet knowing that it could never remain.