Once and future

A day of tragedy

(Warning spoilers for both BBC Merlin and Harry Potter)

Merlin watched as the raft carried Arthur into the sunset, tears streaming down his face. He remembered all of the times they had together the good and the bad. From the teasing and banter to the intense fights to the tender moments of comfort deep in the woods after a battle. Arthur had been Merlin's best friend, his rock, his person. Not for the first time that day Merlin recalled the first time they had met. Arthur was acting like a prat as usual. Perhaps a bit more than usual that day. He had been with his pompous knight friends that day. Merlin liked to think that he had changed Arthur for the better with his influence. Of course, none of that mattered now. Arthur was gone. Right after Merlin had told him about his magic. He should have said something years ago. Then again Arthur may very well have chopped his head off if he had said something earlier, or at the very least never trusted him again. For the past few years Merlin had felt slightly more distant from Arthur. After Arthur and Gwen had finally married. Merlin was happy for them of course. Gwen deserved the world and all the attention that was possible to give. Still he missed what him and Arthur had. Now he realized they would never have that again. Gwen, Merlin thought, she is going to need me. So he stood and took one last look at the Lake of Avalon. "Goodbye, Arthur Pendragon," a final tear streamed down his face, "I hope that one day I will see you again". ________________________________________________________________________________

Merlin took the long walk back to Camelot. He had no horse after Morgana had scared them off. Morgana, Merlin thought, I am so sorry for what happened to you. He would always blame himself for the tragedy that was her life. If he had just told her when she first started to notice her powers. Perhaps then they could be friends. Perhaps then Arthur would not be dead. Maybe then Merlin would not have lost so many friends. He pushed on through the night. His powers kept him awake and alert. By the time he reached the gates of Camelot he had dark circles under his eyes. As he reached the gates two guards immediately took him by the arms and dragged him towards the castle. "What are you doing?!" Merlin cried out. "We have orders to bring you before Queen Guinevere immediately," one of the guards said. "Am I in some kind of trouble?" Merlin asked. The guard shrugged, "Not sure we were told it was a matter of urgency and that you were to take no detours". Surely Gwen was not about to blame Merlin for Arthur's death. Was she?________________________________________________________________________________ They reached the council chambers quickly and the guards outside opened the doors silently. The two men who had escorted Merlin to the palace practically threw him forward into the room. Standing at the round table with Gaius and Leon was Gwen. "What is the meaning of this?" Gwen asked hardly looking up from the table. "We have brought the criminal Merlin". "What?!" Gwen shot her head up, "Merlin is no criminal I specifically instructed you to bring him here not to restrain him and submit him to the treatment of a criminal!" She pinched the bridge of her nose, "Leave us," she said. "Merlin, you must tell me everything that happened. Arthur... is he...". Merlin shook his head slowly. He felt his throat close up. His mouth tightened and an intense burning in his eyes blurred his vision. A single tear made it through his attempt to stop them. _______________________________________________________________________________

Gwen felt her knees give out. Leon caught her as she sobbed. Arthur. The man she had loved for so long. They had had only a few short years together. Only recently they had started talking about children. They were just starting to settle down together. She looked up at Merlin. Her best friend. His hand over his mouth the start of tears beginning to seep through no matter how much he tried to stop. She steadied herself and held her arms out in welcome.

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Merlin practically sprinted forward into the arms of his friend. The two held each other for a long moment. Merlin breathed in every moment of it. The feeling of warmth that she brought him. She was the most familiar thing in the world to him in that moment. She cried into his shoulder and he cried into her hair. He brushed him thumb against her shoulder in comfort for her as well as him. He practically breathed her in as flashbacks came to his mind of the times they had together. The smiles and laughter. The comfort she had brought him. How she had supported him through the death of Freya and his mother's sickness. When Gaius had been kidnapped. She was truly his person. One of the few he was truly comfortable around. One of the few he truly trusted. "Gwen," he said quietly, "I have magic". His eyes widened. What had he just done. Surely he had not just revealed his magic to the queen of Camelot. "Oh no," he said. He backed up and began to make his way towards the door. Gwen caught his arm. "Merlin," she said with a soft smile on her face, "I know". "Oh. And you're okay with it?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. She nodded, looking over his face with that same smile. "I've suspected for a long time, but Merlin you have to know that this changes absolutely nothing about how I feel about you. You are my best friend and always will be. Nothing can change that. Certainly not the very thing that makes you you". Merlin grinned for the first time in three days. He threw his arms around her once more. Of course he would miss Arthur for eternity, but at least he still had his best friend.