The Godless Ones // YunSan

two

     "Boys, this is San. He'll be rooming with you from now on." Sister Bomjae said. After what happened down at the lake San couldn’t bring himself to return to the cabin. Instead he went to camp resources and requested a change without explaining why. When he was asked all he could say was a disagreement and he refused to give any names.

     San stepped into the cabin, watching as its residents scrambled around off of the floor and quickly into their beds. Sister Bomjae rested her hand on his lower back and he winced, squinting his eyes and squaring his shoulders like it would make him disappear. He could feel everyone's eyes burning on him as he stood in the cold doorway, holding the small care package he'd been lent by the sisters. San zoned out at the introductions. He already knew the people in the room. Mingi, Jongho, Seonghwa, and Hongjoong who got up from his bed and took the care package from San's hands. He helped San to the extra cot in the corner of the room where he settled down. He talked to the sister before showing her out while San surveyed the room. It looked just like his other cabin, just from a different angle. Instead of being on the top bunk looking down at the door, he was looking up at his new roommates, sectioned off and isolated from them in the corner of the room. Just like the others, he wasn't one of them.

     San looked through the care package, finding checkered pyjamas that were a bit too big for him. He turned to the corner and pulled off his dirt stained shirt, feeling the cold air against his bruised back. He winced when he heard a hissing sound. He was being stared at once again. It didn't matter where he went, he would be watched. He quickly put on his clothes and shuffled into his neatly made bed, avoiding the gazes of his new roommates. There were quiet murmurs between the others as they moved back onto the floor. San watched them huddle around each other, Seonghwa dealing a deck of cards.

     "San, come here." Mingi said, looking back at him. San pretended he wasn't looking, moving his gaze to the floor.

     "We're playing thirty one. Have you played it before?" Seonghwa asked without turning his head to him. He had already dealt San a hand, leaving a gap in the circle of four people for San to squeeze into. Jongho and Mingi both looked at him expectantly and so San slowly got out of his cot and sat down near the circle, Hongjoong to his left and Jongho to his right.

     "I-I've played a few times." San said, his voice quieter than he'd intended it to be.

     "What happened to your back?" Mingi asked, sitting across from him and looking him straight in the eye. San looked away, looking down at his hand.

     "Did you get into a fight?" Jongho asked.

     "No." San said, shaking his head.

     "You don't need to talk about it." Hongjoong piped up. He grabbed a card from the deck Seonghwa set down, exchanging it with another from his hand.

     "Okay." San sighed.

     “So, you’re the golden boy.” Seonghwa said. San stiffened, only pursing his lips and putting down a card when his turn came around.

     “You’re here because you wanna be here?” Jongho asked. The game continued as they talked, though San didn’t feel like he was a part of the conversation, he felt more like the subject of it. San nodded sheepishly.

     “I’m here cause my parents thought I contracted the transgender from Jongho.” Mingi laughed. Jongho chuckled with him.

     “Mine didn’t want me to come, but I have to watch out for Mingi.” Jongho muttered with a soft smile on his face.

     “She can take care of herself.” Seonghwa said with a shrug.

     “Why take care of myself when there’s a perfectly fit strong man to do it for me?” Mingi said, winking at Jongho who rolled his eyes.