The Internship

Chapter Forty Two - Bad Person

*Tori – Point of View*

 

I run into the bathroom and see Alex on the ground, his bandage uncovering his arm, and his eyes closing.

"ALEX!" I kneel beside him, checking his heart rate.

One...

Two...

Three...

His heart rate is okay, and he looks like he is breathing fine, but it is difficult to see through the tears building up in my eyes. What do I do? Ross. I get up and run to my place looking for him. "Ross! Ross!" I look everywhere, and I don't find him. I dial his number, but there is no answer. I dial again but when I walk into the living room I see Ross' phone vibrating on the table. Where is he? Who else can help? No one. No one can help. I run back to Alex and sit on the ground beside him, crying. I stand up and look in the mirror, checking what he last had out of curiosity. I find a bottle of pills, the cap still open, hanging on the edge of the sill. Upon closer inspection I realise that this isn't his pain medication. This is Ross' old medication for some illness he had. This must be why he blacked out. I put the pills away and kneel down beside Alex. I pull him up to the toilet and lean him over it. This is going to be gross. I shove two fingers up Alex's throat causing his gag reflex to make him puke. Gross, puke on my fingers. None the less I stay with him until he is done puking, making sure he is sitting up right when he is done. I get up and wash my hands, leaving the water cold as I grab a face cloth, socking it in the refreshing water.  I turn off the tap and sit beside Alex, wiping his forehead with the face cloth. He soon opens his eyes and looks over to me, and smiles weakly.

"What- what happened?" His voice is crackly from the time he blacked out and the vomiting.

"You took some of Ross' old pills, and blacked out. Your body must not have liked that." I gave me a small, sad chuckle, before looking at his cut.

"Can you fix this?" I smile and stood up, grabbing the peroxide and the bandages before pulling him up to sit on the bath edge.

"This might sting..." I cover a cotton pad in peroxide, gently placing it on to his wound. Alex hissed in pain and I pulled the pad away from him. I began tearing up. I don't want to hurt him; all he has ever done is be nice to me, save me. That's when it hit me. I had hurt him when I had cut myself, I had hurt him when I spaced myself for a week. I was a bad girlfriend. A bad friend. A bad person. I stepped back away from Alex, and he looked at me confused.

"What's wrong? It hurts, but it needs to be done, so don't worry about me." I stepped back again, feeling a tear roll down my already tear stained face. "Tori..."

"Stay away from me. I will only hurt you..." I managed to stutter past the lump in my throat. Alex looked hurt, but at the same time looked like he understood.

"Tori, you never will hurt me. You not talking for a week upset me, but only because I thought I did something wrong. You harming yourself... it upset me, but because I feel I am not there enough for you. And this right now, you are helping me. You are not hurting me, and you never will. The only thing that will hurt me is if you leave. I don't know what I will do then. I love you Tori. And I will never stop, even if something happens. I will not stop. Ever." The tears came more frequently now, and I lowered my arms holding the space between me and Alex, looking at him with heart broken eyes. He walked over to me and hugged me, holding me as I cried into his shoulder.

"I love you too Alex. And I will never leave." I hope.

*Duncan – Point of View*