The Belly of the Beast

Ch. 65, Blue

I woke in Dagger's room the next morning. I still hadn't been to whatever room they'd assigned me—his was plenty big enough for the both of us. We'd spent the early night talking about the Eel— though I still hadn't yet told him my plan to locate him. Instead, our discussion focused on if the Eel would even want to help us. I hoped because he was from the Belly, if we told him the truth about what happened to Level N, and that it might happen again, he would help us. Dagger was less sure. It was a risk, but so was everything we did now.

Then our conversation had drifted toward Second Earth, and the lives we might have had without letters. Though we were only inches apart, he never made a move, which made my mind spin with questions long after his eyes closed and breathing steadied. So far I had been the one to initiate both kisses. Did he not like me that way? That wasn't what it felt like when he'd kissed me, but what if he didn't like women at all? Or what if he did, but preferred curvy, tall, blond women like Xyla?

Now, with the sounds of people passing by in the hallways, and the faint brightening of the lights, I didn't draw away. Laying there, beside him, I wondered which of the thousand lost scents of Old Earth he smelled like; fresh rain, a mountain pinecone, or a cool breeze on a hot day.

Dagger stirred beside me. "Good morning," he said, voice rough and low from sleep, yet somehow still managing his usual formality. He'd slept on his stomach, which I found odd. I've never slept next to anyone besides Xyla and Yana. Maybe all men sleep on their stomachs? I wished I could have asked Xyla.

With his cheeks red and eyes drowsy from sleep, there was an innocence to him I hadn't seen before. "Do you think the sky was blue?" I said suddenly, thinking back to our discussion last night. "On Old Earth?"

He rubbed a hand over his eyes, still waking up, and then rolled over onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. I would have traded my metal arm to know what he was thinking at that moment. "That's how my sister always painted it," he finally said.

"You have a sister?"

"I did. My twin."

He has, or had, a twin. And a father. He knife fights, and killed the only person who ever loved him. I held these small pieces of knowledge close, precious as if they were fragments of the sky.

"She was the creative one," he said. "Always asking questions about Second Earth. I thought she made up the sky being blue, but I asked her once, and she told me it was from a book."

"What happened to her?"

"She died." And just as quickly, the wall rose between us again. He swung his legs off the bed, and walked to the sink, splashing water on his face as I tried not to watch.

"Should we go look for the Eel?" I asked. "I've got a plan."

"Actually, I have somewhere I wanted to go first. Can finding the Eel wait a few hours?"

What could possibly be more important than finding the Eel? But, as always, my curiosity got the best of me. "Sure... if it's important."

"It is."

"Then, let's go."

He didn't explain more, and I didn't ask. I just got ready and then followed him out the door, wondering what it said about me that I was ready to follow him anywhere.