Mariana finds out the husband she grieved for is alive after all these years.
Now she must adjust to a new life with the return of Alfie Solomons, without Thomas Shelby and with the new threat of Michael Gray hanging over all of their heads.
Alfie...
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Mariana's POV
I'm... I'm not pregnant "Mar? You going to say something?" Ada urged
"I thought... I thought I was pregnant" I mumbled quietly "What?" She asked surprised "I felt sick, I wasn't sleeping very well, I... I just thought..." I shrugged
"And you feel... sad?" She asked gently, clearly trying to navigate the conversation "No. No of course not. I... I can't have another baby" I chuckled
I couldn't I was 41. Me and Alfie weren't golden I was bad enough after Charlotte...
It was ridiculous to think I could have another child I had told myself all day I couldn't have another one And yet...
And yet the heaviness that sat in my heart confused me All the thoughts of a baby had plagued my mind Now... now they haunted it
Of what I could have had I could have had another baby...
What am I saying? No. No I couldn't
She watched me "What?" I asked "You wanted it" she said "No. I didn't I... I don't" I argued
"You do" she smiled sadly, sitting beside me "I can't have a child at my age, not after everything" I said
"You can throw as much logic as you want at it Mar, doesn't make your feelings any different" she said, rubbing my arm "I know... why does it hurt Ada?" I asked
"Because you grieve the loss of a child every day. Maybe deep down... you truly wanted another one. Maybe you didn't want to lose another one. Even if it was never there" she explained
And it made sense So much sense "Does Alfie know?" He asked I shook my head "He'll be back tomorrow" I said "And you'll tell him?" She asked
"What's there to tell Ada?" I shrugged "I didn't lose a baby. There isn't one" I said "No. But you thought there might have been. He needs to know that" she said gently
"I know" I nodded
She put her arm around me, rubbing my arm
Alfie's POV
Fuck this place I was glad to see the back of it And the back of them All stood on dock still as the boat began to leave
•
I got back late Very late It was around two in the morning when I trudged into Ollie's house knackered
