Good Boy Gone Bad

95 ➵ Danielle

♕ Danielle ♕

I miss him.

But with every day that passes, things get just that little bit easier.

But then today... seeing him at the beach. Why does it make my heart swell? With that tiniest sense of hope?

No.

Nothing can take back what happened. I would have no respect for myself If I ever let him back in.

I walk around the old arcade with Charles.

"This is your ingenious plan to distract me?" I laugh lightly.

"The plan is: I get you some cotton candy and you watch me win a mega prize on the stacker machine."

"Just because you won it once doesn't mean –"

"I defy the odds just by existing – being so damn attractive and smart and charismatic. Watch me do it again."

I roll my eyes as I tack on to the end of the line-up for cotton candy. "I think I'll be waiting in line for like twenty minutes. Why don't you go ahead to stacker and warm up."

"Good idea," he says, jumping from one foot to the other. "You know where it is, right?"

"You are like a cute little puppy." I sigh. "Of course, I know where it is. We only spend like an hour there every time we come here."

"Love you later!" he says and runs off in the direction of the stacker machine.

"Love you later," I say, more to myself.

The line-up for cotton candy moves faster than I anticipated. The family in front of me, that appears to be made up of eight or-so children, decide to ditch the line when a cosplay Buzz Lightyear offers to take a picture with them.

When I make it to the front of the line, I decide I don't even feel like cotton candy. I don't want my sour mood to ruin the taste and set a precedent. The idea of eating anything makes me feel a little bit nauseous and being alone with my thoughts doesn't make it any better. I abandon the line and head towards the stacker machine.

A random couple is playing stacker when I get there.

"Charles?" I call walking in a small circle around the nearby games.

This area of the arcade isn't busy. Other than the chaotic and infinite sounds of ringing and chiming and shooting, the place is half empty. I should be able to spot him.

"Charles?" I call out again and pull my phone from my pocket.

Me : Where did you go? I'm at stacker.

Me : I'll wait here for you.

Gen : Hey girlie. Are we still good to meet at yours later? xx

Me : Yes. Charles and I are just finishing up at the arcade.

I stand a few feet away from the couple playing stacker. The boyfriend can't seem to stack more than four blocks up before losing. The girlfriend takes a turn and wins a minor prize. The boyfriend smiles down at her, gives her an enthusiastic high five, and helps her pick a prize.

The interaction is plain and pleasant.

I wanted that with Robin.

The thought of him alone makes that guilty feeling rumble in my stomach. A feeling like I forgot something. But I haven't forgotten kissing Ash and making a fool of myself at Gen's party. And I'm so mad at myself for giving in to the age-old crush I've had on him without thinking what it would do to Robin. Treat others how you want to be treated.