My kind of man (ENGLISH)-Tomkaulitz-

chapter-30-

As soon as he finished fucking me until he fainted he left me there in the room, naked, and helpless.

I lay on my side, with my shoulders facing the open door.

After a while Derek came in.

Derek<<what's beauty? Didn't you like it? >> he asked me while he was on the doorstep, still naked and with a cigarette in his mouth.

I didn't answer, and I turned around again.

Derek<<don't be mad at me! Did you know you should pay me! >>

Alisia<<YES BUT I BELIEVED IN MONEY! >> I said in a trembling voice.

Derek<< how many stories! In the end you're just a bitch like the others! You fuck every day and I'm aware of it, so don't fuck up because you're not a virgin! >>

Alisia<<I DON'T FUCK EVERY DAY! AND EVEN IF IT WERE, I DIDN'T AUTHORIZED YOU TO
FUCK ME! >> I said standing up.

Derek walked up to me and kissed my neck.

Derek<<I'm so I've always been a weak point of yours...>> he whispered to me.

Alisia<<yes ok! You know, but it's still me that I don't want ok?! >>

Derek<<oh Alisia, you're fucking in love>>

Alisia<<eh?! What the fuck are you saying! It's not that if I don't want to fuck with you it means I'm in love>>

Derek<<they all want to fuck me, why don't you? >>

Alisia<<it's not that I don't want to, but if you hurt me it's obvious that I don't want to! >>

Derek<<then you see what you want>> he licked my neck.

Alisia<<YES DEREK I ALWAYS LIKED YOU WHEN I WAS SMALLER, BUT NOW NOT
MORE! >>

Derek<<I still like you>>>

Alisia<<no... no Derek, I don't like you, you don't care at all because I know you're a shitty person! >>

Derek<<I was 18 years old that you were
expecting! >>

Alisia << and now you have 22 but if always a dickhead! >>

Derek<<just because when I was a kid I deluded you? >>

Alisia << yes ..... and then YOU WERE a little boy? Now what do you call yourself a man?! >>

Derek << "Listen, here between the two the little girl is you! >>

Alisia <<I'm talk about a jerk mentality>>

Derek<<mmh, in fact, you're very mature, you've had guys killed for a little boy on his head who doesn't even want you! >>

"Not even wants you" those words rumbled in my head.

Derek<<what's up? Did I hit a sore button? >>

Alisia<< YOU ARE ALWAYS THE USUAL ASSHOLE SEE!! >>I said starting to get dressed.

Derek <<I'm not an asshole, I'm a realist>>

Alisia<< do you know what's up? Fuck you Derek>>I said and then approached the door to leave.

Derek<< and come on! >>he said grabbing my arm.
Derek<<reak some more here! >>

Alisia<<NO! >>

Derek<<you see that I'm not the one calling you only when I need you, you're the first, and that's why no one has ever really loved you, because you're a careless bitch, you only care about yourself and that's it, you're just bad, you don't think twice about hurting other people's feelings, ask two questions IF NO ONE LOVES YOU>>

Alisia<<FUCK OF DEREK! >> I screamed with all the strength I had in my body.

I walked to the exit of the house, and went to my house, but I took a taxi.

*Arrived home*

Maybe Derek is right, no one loves me.

But why do I care about that 'nobody'?
Maybe because that 'no one' is tom.
Well, if he doesn't love me, I'll make myself loved.
We'll see!

I took the keys to my father's motorcycle, got on it and went to Tom's house.

I hid behind a bush, and started spying on it from the window.

Is he playing the guitar? What a good he is ..

He suddenly opened the bathroom door, and a naked girl came out, Tom threw his eyes to the sky biting his lip, laid down his guitar and approached her putting his hands on her hips.

Tom<<oh how much I love you>> he said kissing her.

At that moment I felt a strange feeling in my chest, something inside me was slowly tearing.

I left with my head down, got on the bike and run away.

When I get home, I throw myself on the bed.

And I stare at the ceiling.

What's wrong with me?
I kept wondering in the silence of the room.

Keep going...