Connection

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Ilyana has no idea how long she has been sitting there in the dirt with her legs crossed trying to 'connect to the Force' as Cal described it. Finally, she opens her eyes and stares at the stone as if she might intimidate it into helping her understand. How is it any different from what I've done before? She lets out an aggravated huff and leans back on her hands.

Just then, she recognizes a presence behind her and jumps to her feet. She whips around, ready to defend herself, only to find Cere standing about ten feet away, watching her. How long has she been there? Ilyana wonders.

"The Sith," Cere begins, "focus on the Force as it relates to one's self and what it can do for them. They put their devotion into pride, greed, ambition, and revenge. The Inquisitors may not have taught you the ways of the Force, but you've spent seven years immersed in a machine fueled by those ideals. Whether you know it or not, you were forged by the ways of the Sith and the Dark Side."

Ilyana listens quietly but does not move. She cannot tell if Cere is trying to help her or if her words are meant as an accusation.

"The Jedi," Cere continues, "focus on connection, interaction; the relationship between living things. The Force moves through all of us and through the galaxy. The Jedi live with the Force rather than trying to bend it to their will."

Cere finishes talking and as she turns and goes back to the ship, a skeptical smile crosses her face as if to say that she does not believe Ilyana will be able to make that change. Ilyana watches her go, feeling confused and very annoyed with that smile, like it was a challenge.

...connect to the Force deliberately, as a way of being... Cal's voice comes back to her again as she turns her back to the ship.

"Are all Jedi this cryptic?" she asks the stone, "Wait, patience, connection, the Force moves through us, with us," she continues saying to herself, working through a thought that is just shy of realization.

What happened that first time, she thinks. That first time she had used the Force she had not been trying to use it at all, but had been looking into herself for her lost memories.

"What happened?" she asks herself, "What did I do?"

Then the thought finally materializes. Without sitting back down she closes her eyes, and stops trying to connect to the Force but instead just allows herself to feel it. She stands there still, breathing slowly and deeply until time loses meaning. She allows each breath to slowly fill her up completely before being released again, and with each release her breath moves farther past her body. No, not her breath, rather waves are forming from her and moving off in all directions. As they spread she becomes more and more aware of all the things around her; the ground beneath her feet, the stone Cal had set before her. The waves continue to spread and she becomes acutely aware that life teems all around her, even in this desolate place. Creatures move about beneath the sand, burrowing new pathways beneath the dirt and stone only for those paths to close again once they have passed. Deeper beneath the desert, water flows through the rock, carving wide underground rivers which carry small aquatic creatures and microorganisms whose lives and deaths feed the planet.

"I see you," the voice echoes through her senses again now as it had that day long ago, but this time she does not let go of the connection.

"Who are you?" she asks.

"Who am I?" the voice responds. "I am the one in the middle."

"What does that mean?" she asks but just then a cry breaks through. That was Greez and he's in trouble! The thought pulls her back to the outcrop and immediately breaks the connection. She turns and runs back to the Mantis just as a great crashing sound comes from within the ship. In her haste, she does not notice the many stones around her suddenly fall to the ground.

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