Redeemer

Two Fragments

Redeemer leaned against the outer wall of the inn and covered his face with shaking hands. His heart hurt with a scalding agony that he could barely control. Wei was here. Wei was back. And he, even after sixteen years, was ill-prepared for the changes that he had just seen. Not the same body, but that was understandable; the lovely, precious one from before had been obliterated in a burst of resentful energy, was gone. But his mind seemed altered as well. There were glimpses of the old Wei, but things seemed scattered and out of balance, even blank at times. And the worst of it all was he had never wanted to return to him in the first place. That ripped him apart. However, right now, Redeemer could only deal with these first demands from him. These, at least, he could fulfill.

Lan Zhan had sworn each time he had played inquiry, that if he was ever blessed with the chance to make up for his lack of...everything...he would do so. And doing what he promised Silhouette,as soon as humanly possible, was his first attempt. 

He dashed for the small exchange and placed the voucher before them. It was scrutinized, Lan Zhan showed his jade Sect badge and received his strings of silver and copper. He then moved into the market and searched for the perfect ribbon. The one he stumbled upon in the forest, the one he could not part with, was to never leave his wrist. This took a bit of time until he found one that would suit Wei Ying's taste for color and beauty. Deep crimson, heavy, double woven silk, intricately embroidered with gold thread in a lotus motif, yet faintly, sparingly, almost invisibly, the artist had sewn a curling cloud that only rarely showed up in the background, as it were just a minor supporting player. 

That was not lost on Lan Zhan. After all, it was how he had begun to see himself, now; a quiet support to the outrageously ebullient Wei.  At the time when he was young and strictly brought up, all he knew, in order to help him, was the Lan ways. All Wei could do as a teen, was follow his own way, a way that first saved him but in the end, wrought his destruction. And to add fuel to the fire, neither of them even knew how to find the middle that might have saved them both. No, it took 16 years of self-castigation, suffering, and soul-searing grief to force him to lay indoctrination aside. Wei Ying, no matter the outcome, was now his universe. He would never waver again, no matter the cost.

To his surprise, he found a matching belt pouch, and he added that to the purchases. After one more stop, he headed back, trying not to run and make a complete fool out of himself. He failed miserably. He paused after making sure Wei Ying was still eating, then ran a cautious hand over his still-perfect hair. He straightened his robe into immaculate folds and eased the money strings into the new pouch. Taking time, he tied the ribbon around the pouch to close it, took a deep breath, and then walked in false dignity to the table. 

Wei Ying mumbled around a mouth full of food. "That was quick."

Lan Zhan bowed and waited until Wei Ying swallowed.  "I hope this satisfies the rest of the agreement. " He placed the pouch and ribbon on the table.

He was stunned when Wei Ying, eyes sparkling like a delighted child, slowed pulled the bow loose, and smoothed the band out. "Wow! This is so much nicer than my old one. Hey! Give me a hand. I can't see what I am doing; tie this thing around my topknot, okay?"

He did as he was bidden. In fact, he allowed himself to do more. He let the topknot down despite Wei Ying's objection, removed a wooden comb from his sleeve, and smoothed it up and back. Wei Ying leaned back into the movements, lips slightly parted as the untamed hair was neatly captured and skillfully pinned back in place. Lan Zhan wrapped the ribbon, knotting it so that the long ends hung loose, and they intermingled with the dark waves that had a mind of their own. He glanced down, and the eyes had gone soft and dreamy, the lids closed, and a voice said, "That was nice. It has been a while." Suddenly the eyes became confused, snapping open. Lan Zhan stepped back quickly, his face smoothing into casual and non-committal lines. This man, this soul, was lost again, yanked back into bitter present. Lan Zhan did not want to force recollection when it seemed to upset him. Wei Ying was already dealing with decisions made completely against his will. 

"So.. .ahem...this is my money?"

"Yes. You may count it if you wish."

"No. You seem honest if nothing else."

"Hm."

Wei Ying froze at the  sound, looking confused again. He made as if to leave, but Redeemer, back in control of his own new persona, said, "I will have some business to attend to here tonight. Later, I will be dealing with a small group of fierce corpses. Previously contracted. Join me  after my business is done, if you wish. From now on, I will steer away and leave this area to you. I will forward requests from here if you choose to stay. Your income is safe. Have a good evening."  He paused, then laid two round jars of Emperor's Smile, tied together with a red string at the necks, on the table before the astonished Silhouette.

"That is something else I owe you. It may take time. It may take eternity, but I always pay my debts." 

He finally took the initiative and was the first to pin the other down with a long and searching stare. Silhouette sat, speechless for once that bright morning, mouth slightly ajar, and allowed himself to drink in the beauty before him; an older beauty who looked worn and tired, seasoned if you will by time and harsh lessons. It drew him in, yet it terrified him as well. 

It was the Redeemer who broke the look and backed away. He would never force his ways upon him again. It had brought disaster to them both. If Silhouette wanted to recover his past, it would have to be always at his pace, Only what he was ready to discover. Redeemer would watch, would protect, and catch him if he fell.

He walked up to his room. It took all of his strength as he sensed Wei Ying turn and leave. But how do you beg a virtual stranger to stay with you forever, if he shows no inclination to even like you? He did not know how to even begin.