At the risk of losing you

Chapter 7 : Settlements of accounts

A few days later, school starts again. I don't care about going back to class, but I'm sad to see Nicolas going back to university. I know I won't see him again for a long time, because he's thinking of going to Florida to party with his friends during spring break. I know a lot of siblings argue. Nick and I are no exception to the rule but it's never mean, we bicker and make up straight away. My brother is truly the shoulder I can lean on.

When the bell rings, announcing the resumption of classes, I still haven't seen Jessy arrive, which worries me. He's never late usually. Half an hour later, I was relieved to see him enter the classroom. He hands the algebra teacher a note of apology, winks as he passes me and comes to sit at the desk behind mine. As soon as the teacher turns his attention to the big blackboard, I take the opportunity to turn around.

— How are you ? I was scared when I didn't see you this morning.

— Sorry, I was detained in the analysis laboratory.

I raise my eyebrows worriedly. Jessy pulls up the sleeve of his navy blue sweater and shows me the trace of a blood test. So today he went for a new examination to find out the status of the virus infection.

— I'm not bothering you too much, Miss Crawfords ?  Mr. Stark suddenly asks me.

I turn around, the teacher is leaning over my desk and staring at me. I jump as the whole class bursts out laughing.

— Hello, shame ! I say as we leave class.

— No, that made me laugh. The best student caught in the act of gossiping !

Jessy laughs again as I wish I would disappear underground. Sympathetically, he places his arm around my neck.

— Don't worry, this isn't going to stop you from going to college. It just shows that you're human.

He places a kiss on my forehead and, like a wounded child who is given a kiss to heal, I feel a little better.

— And it's me who should be feeling bad, given the results I'm expecting, he said, seeing my sad face.

— It's not that. Nick is leaving again later, it's really killing me.

— You'll see him again this summer, don't worry, it will pass quickly, and then you'll call each other.

— Yes I know. I'm just a selfish bastard who loves her big brother so much that she wishes she could keep him close to her.

— Do you have this reaction with everyone you love ?

— All without exception.

I confirm, disappointed to admit one of my worst faults.

— It's very interesting.

I don't understand where he's going with this.

— Why do you say that ?

— Because you're not ready to let me go !

This idea must please him, because he breaks into a big smile. Generally, the people around me don't like this flaw that makes me keep them close to me, for Jessy, it's the opposite, he must think that in a certain way, I will connect him to life for the longest time. possible.

— When will you have your test results ?

My boyfriend grimaces before responding :

— Tomorrow, in the morning.

— You stress ?

— It's ok for now. We will see tomorrow.

As I approach my house, I see Nick outside waiting to say goodbye to me, before heading back on the road. My parents and Nina are near him. This vision makes me want to cry, I have to fight to hold back.