And one cigar

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Jessica was just now realizing the gravity of her next move. She shouldn't tell her, she just shouldn't... She let the door half open and backed away. Then fast-paced back to her room or wherever else.

"Jessica"

She froze in place. She knew it was Emily calling, but what struck her was the concerned tone. She braced herself and turned on her heels.

Emily was out in a navy satin robe and had her dark hair up in a messy bun, arms crossed. Jessica got closer, and she saw the smudged mascara and red eyes.

"Are you ok?" She worried.

"Am I ok? What the fuck are you doing at 3 am opening people's doors and then just running off?" Emily's hair quivered as she spoke, and her claw clip slipped out of it and fell to the ground with a noisy thump.

Wordless- is what Jessica was at that instant. Her sentiments were unfathomable to herself. She bent down to pick the clip up but did it at the same time as Emily. Their heads were now inches apart and they both froze in place struck by their sudden proximity. Emily took the clip and got up, Jessica still on the kneeling.

"Look if you want to come to my room or anything..." Emily faltered looking down at the other girl.

"Are you asking me to your room at 3 o'clock in the night?" Jessica jested coyly looking up at Emily with kitten's eyes.

Emily turned her head as if stung by her ex-friend's gaze. Her demeanor seemed rebuffing.

"Goodnight Emily." Jessica got up.

"Yes... I'm asking you to my room." With one last intent look Emily walked to her room and opened the door looking back at Jessica.

                                                                       *

"So, you have anything to drink around here?" Jessica asked lazily sprawled on Emily's twin-sized bed the brandy she had engulfed with Sam finally hitting her bloodstream. She was well about her limit, but she needed liquid courage for what she was scheming.

"I think you've had about enough." Emily countered, rolling her eyes. She went to one of her shelves and searched for something in a rusty cupboard. Jessica couldn't see much because Emily's back was facing her.

"You know... It's not that great with Mike."

Emily stopped searching and closed the cabinet with one final screech.

"That's great honey. If there's any more nonsense you feel like telling me... I'm going outside to smoke this." She walked towards the balcony.

Jessica got up and slipped into some French beige moccasins, they were probably Matts judging by the size.

Emily was already out on the couch. This was the room with the best balcony, it had always been Emily's because she was the smoker in the group. So, of course, a sofa and isolation with closeable widows were the preferred choices.

"It's so cold though" Jessica whined. Emily passed her one of Matt's jackets. It was the Canada Goose navy one he wore all the time out here. She felt a shiver going down her spine as she put it on. She didn't like where this was going although it seemingly wasn't going anywhere.

Emily lighted her slender Macanudo Cafe Portofino cigar. And Jessica flung herself down beside her.

She pulled the folded green knitted blanket lying beside her and wrapped herself in it. As she turned around to place it around her friend, she saw Emily was crying, sobbing really. She had a fireball bottle in her hand, which was Matt's favorite drink, but Emily hated it most.

"Em, what's wrong?" Asked Jessica concerned as she gently placed her palm on Emily's shoulder. Emily faced her and tried talking.

"I don't know... I feel so bad for Sam. I mean, I never meant to hurt her. It's just that... well, I was just..."

"You were just what?" Then came a pause.

Jessica could feel the air around them getting heavier by the minute. It was like poison insidiously seeping into her lungs.

Emily drew from the cigarette and then offered it to Jessica.

She hadn't smoked in years, but so had Emily. Besides, drunk smoking didn't count. She puffed on it and let the familiar smoke fill her lungs.

"Just what?" she asked again exhaling the smoke and pulling it back in through her nose.

Emily drew her breath "I suppose I wanted to make someone else admit something I never could."

Jessica gasped quietly.

"You mean...?"

"You know just what I mean!"

They were both drunk, this was silly.

Jessica's heart skipped a beat and then somehow, she was face to face with Emily, inches apart.

Jessica got closer to the other girl, and she was now breathing on her cheek, so close her nose rubbed against Emily's soft freezing cold skin.

Emily slowly turned her face until her lips met Jessica's.

It was like dynamite wrapped around her heart ticking and ticking, finally exploding at that instant. Little sparkling lights were dancing behind her eyelids. No air was left in her lungs, but as she kissed and kissed and kissed, she realized she didn't need any. Maybe she was going to breathe and take all of the girl in.

When they finally parted, they were gasping for air staring deeply into each other eyes.

                                                           **

They both cuddled next to each other in Emily's twin bed after they had taken a warm bath- separately of course. They had both decided, given their intoxicated state, that it was best not to do anything rash.

"Well, would you look at that, it's already 6 o'clock," Emily remarked.

"Emily?"

"Yes?"

"What are we gonna tell the others?"

"I don't think we can tell them any of this..." Em sighed.

"Let us run away then!"

"What?"

Jessica got out of their embrace and jumped up.

"I'm serious," she said packing. "Let's get away from here, go to your place, your parents are away anyhow. It would be perfect!"

Emily was now wide awake as well, adrenaline pumping through her nervous system. She knew it was crazy, they were just running away from what they should have been facing but with Jessica by her side, Emily felt like she could even cheat death.


"Ok"

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