never knew I could feel like this.

fourth - blazing fire.

Things are going surprisingly well. In retrospect Jay isn't sure why he was so afraid. With Jungwon everything is so easy. They still text like they used to, maybe a bit more flirty now and Jay gets so many selfies he has his personal 'Jungwon'-folder on his phone. Also their dates are great. Classic, like going to the cinema or a restaurant. Cozy, like ordering food and watching a movie or reading books while cuddling. And one time they went to a haunted house. Well, it would be kind of fun, if Jay weren't afraid of ghosts. Jungwon didn't know, Jay didn't say anything and just played along, while almost died inside. But most important: almost every date ends with a make out-session. Mostly in Jays apartment, because he lives alone. They never went farther than kissing and touching each other over their clothes, but Jay's content with it. He doesn't want to push Jungwon, even sometimes it's really hard. Like right now, when he's getting another picture of Jungwon. This time he's wearing a loose fitting white tank top, sweat droplets cling on his collarbone and his bangs hang in damp strands in his forehead. Caption: fresh out of dance class.

Another fact he learned during the last few weeks. Jungwon still dances in his free time. He visits a dance studio near campus twice a week just for fun and staying fit. And apparently driving Jay crazy.

"Aaah this time he got adventurous, huh?", Sunghoon states.

Jay didn't realize that he looked over his shoulder to get a peek of the picture. He quickly locks the screen and glares at Sunghoon. "Don't look at my boyf- Jungwon!"

"Boyfriend?", Sunghoon muses with a raised eyebrow.

"No? Yes, I guess?", Jay sighs. "I seriously don't know, we don't have a 'label'."

"Why not?"

Jay doesn't know why he tells Sunghoon about how Jungwon and he got to this point, where they are now. He's normally not the type who spills his thoughts to anybody. Okay maybe Sunghoon is someone who he would describe as his kind of best friend, but still he never confided anything to him.

"Okay first of all: that was probably the most emotional insight I ever got from you. Thank you for that. Second: please let Jungwon never go! He's the best thing that ever happened to you. And third: you're so in love with him, it's disgusting. How didn't you notice? Are you that emotionally constipated?", Sunghoon rambles on.

In love. To be honest, Jay never thought of that word. Love. It doesn't do justice for what he's feeling for Jungwon. But yeah, maybe that's the closest description that fits.

"Huh... I guess you have a point here", Jay replies bluntly.

"I guess I have a point here? Yah, no shit Sherlock...", Sunghoon mocks and shakes his head, before he has to leave to help a costumer.

Jay looks again at the picture Jungwon sent and the following message, which asks if the date this evening still stands. He smiles, before he replies a quick 'yes, ofc' and for good measure puts a heart emoji next to it. Maybe tonight he can confirm if Sunghoon theory is really right.

***

It gives Jay little flashbacks, as he stands in his kitchen, stirring tomato sauce with a cooking spoon in a pot, waiting for Jungwon. This time no Curry, Jungwon wanted Pasta and what Jungwon wants, Jay delivers. He sets the table, the worries over the cramped space or the unmatching dishes long forgotten. Also the thoughts about if this is a date, because yes, it is. Now it's more about the things Sunghoon said.

Love. The more, he twists the word around in his head, the more he puts it in context to Jungwon, the more it makes sense. As Jungwon always says, he's really an idiot.