❥・ 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐓𝐰𝐨 𝐨𝐟 ❝𝐒𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬❞ ▸ After Wooyoung and San realize their feelings for each other in Insomnia, their lives have changed drastically. From moving into an apartment together to getting new jobs, life seems to be changing for...
There is a lot of mentions of relapsing, unrequited feelings, anxiety/mental health, and a lot of angst and confrontation. Please do not read any further if these topics are sensitive to you.
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⸻✧ ༺ ∞ ༻ ✧⸻
I promise.
A selfish manner of speaking just for the sake of holding someone accountable. Wooyoung hates promises, but only because he knows that promises were meant to be broken. He didn't want to lie to San any more, nor did he want to hurt him any longer. Wooyoung could sense the pain radiating off of him, he could see the sadness laced in his russet hues, but he could also hear the monotone depth to his voice that remained reserved and uneasy.
It was never his intention to hurt his partner like this. The last thing he ever imagined doing was leaving like this, even if it was just for a brisk walk into town. He had brushed his hands through his hair and tied it back, folding his arms to his chest as he walked out of the home and up the driveway, turning left and down the sidewalk, allowing every pressing thought to come and demand to be felt.
Wooyoung had spent years managing his anxiety alone, and even still with a proper management system and supportive friends, he finds himself struggling to be honest. The real reason behind hiding alcohol in his closet was incomprehensible. It didn't make any sense to anyone, not even himself, yet he did it anyway. There was a sliver of hope threaded through his aching heart, waiting to use the bottle of soju as a safety net, catching him if he dared to fall any further than he ever has before.
Surely with a sip, a small taste, he could bounce back and settle into normal habits again, only to avoid sinking into the pits of hell. But he was wrong. So, so incredibly wrong. He didn't anticipate this to happen, nor did he account for it. As someone with anxiety, Wooyoung had always thought through everything with meticulous intent, struggling to live without worry. This was no different. Every single outcome, every instance he could foresee himself struggling through was always met with the ultimatum of healthily coping until he couldn't anymore.
He had San and his friends, he had his books and he had his job; all things placed into life to serve as a mere distraction from something darker that he was avoiding. A sinking, lingering feeling of judgment. There was no coming back from this unscathed and he knew that, he just really had hoped that it would never come to this.
The breeze is warm as Wooyoung walks, twirling through his messy hair and down the sill of his spine, bringing a slight comfort to ease over his skin as he lets the quiet pull of nature make him numb. He didn't know where he was going, walking aimlessly, hands nearly glued to his sides as he thought through the night, wondering why he let himself spiral out of control.
He was anxious, though he didn't really understand why. That was possibly part of the problem, but he had also told himself that he was going to have one drink. One drink turned into two, then three and then five or six. He downed nearly half of a bottle of vodka on his own, but he never realized how inebriated he was until he was dancing around with Yeosang and Seonghwa, feeling his world tilt on its axis and his head begin to spin.
