Fragments mend

Gazes of love and pain.

I love how you smile even when you're broken.

I love how your face brightens when you look at other girl's faces, but darkens when you look at mine.

I love how when our eyes meet for a brief second,

Yours flicker and mine sting,

submerging me beneath a cascade of anguish.

A cascade of pure torment and remorse,

making its way up to my brain.

Burning my sight,

extinguishing my light.

I'm using every ounce of strength to fight back tears,

to forbid them from skating down,

but it's done in vain.

They're rolling down,

soaking my cheeks,

dominating me.

I love how easily you fake a smile,

pretending that you're completely fine.

I love how you let them touch you the same way I did,

allowing their hands to linger on your face, neck and jawline.

You immediately glance sideways at me.

Your eyes are filled with rigidity.

I freeze instantly.

I freeze and I watch her savor you.

I unfocused at this torturous scene.

Everything went blue.

And you knew.

Background noises suddenly faded.

Everything deviated,

twisted,

like I deserve to be this weighted.

I love how you can pretend that we never existed.

How easily you have erased me,

until I became nothing but an old scar.

A scar that will forever remind you of my presence,

A time when I was once your only essence.

I love how I still remember the way your lips felt on my skin,

the way you captured my chin,

directing my face towards yours with a grin.

I love how I still keep the bracelet you gave me,

back when I was everything your eyes would see,

when you couldn't escape reality,

society's brutality.

You made me your world's gravity.

That's when I realized that I loved you for eternity.

I love how you know you want me but can't have me.

I love how you know we're meant for each other but can't be together.

I love how you used all your power to get rid of me,

but still my face is the only thing that you think of since years.

What comes to your mind desperately.

The only reason behind your tears.

What you think of when you wake up,

what governs your dreams.

What causes you bliss and pain,

sorrow and pleasure.

Is it possible to feel grief and joy simultaneously?

because that's how I feel at the mere sight of you,

at the mere memory of you.

I love how you still love me.

I love how I still love you after everything.

I love how we keep hurting each other.

I love how we keep denying what was once between us.

I love how none of us want to admit that our feelings are still there,

suspended in the air,

waiting for us to finally care.

They're lost between two coasts, floating aimlessly.

two coasts that can never merge,

serving as a constant reminder

of how blinding love can be.

I love how one day, when it is too late,

when we wouldn't be able to alter the course of our fate,

when we wouldn't be able to think straight,

when I would be wrapped up in another man's arms and you would have another mate.

I love how when I finally allow my gaze to make its journey to you,

and our eyes meet again,

only then,

will mine flicker and yours sting.