yestergaze ✦ lhs.

01

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12/11/2005

While I wait for a bus to come at the shed, the sun is shining brightly on the street. Holding onto my bag strap, I waited impatiently. About thirty minutes remain for class.

Upon the arrival of a bus, I proceeded inside and took a seat by the window. As soon as the bus moved, I leant against the window. I gazed upon the sun. It made me think of him. He was my ray of sunlight, My Sunshine.

After a short while, I got off the bus and started walking to our school. As I entered the hallway, I observed Yoona and Sara chatting in front of their locker when I met eyes with Yoona.

"Oh, she's here." Yoona addressed Sara.

"Here is the President!" She shouted. As I glanced at Sara, embarrassed.

"Shut up. The voting hasn't even began yet." I rolled my eyes and muttered. Sara laughed when she saw how pissed I was.

"I'm just excited! you'll win without a doubt!" Sara exclaimed in a loud voice. As more students glanced at us, the more embarrassed I feel. With a look of disgust on my face, I look at Yoona while she giggles.

"I have to go, my English teacher always arrives early," Yoona said while Sara and I nodded.

"I'm anxious... My opponent is strong." I pointed out to Sara.

"Seungho? Him? Strong? How come? Given his numerous issues, I'm sure he wouldn't survive." Sara reassured me in a whisper. "Don't even worry about it; a lot of teachers hold grudges against him either. He was caught paying his teacher to raise his marks once."

"Where do you get those?" I said, curious.

"Secret! Let's go to class, We're going to be late." Sara pushed me and said as we headed to our classroom.

Sara and I are in the same class; Yoona is in a different one. I've known these two since my sophomore year, since our previous school. We all moved school just this year, for there was an incident on our recent school that caused us to move all here.

As of right now, I'm a candidate for president of the student council at my school. I never was the kind of person to actually try this things out. I couldn't even present myself to the crowds. There was just one certain reason.

After school, I organized my locker and packed my belongings. When I unexpectedly noticed someone coming toward me.

"Jihyun." Seungho, another candidate for the student council president called me, I turned to face him with a bored expression as I shut my locker.

"I heard... Your Grandmother's extremely sick?" He said with a grin. Is he happy about it?

"And where did you get that?" I told him, slightly getting annoyed. As he fixed his face and cleared his throat.

"Look, I'm not gonna take time with this. You know... you can lend money from me anytime right? I'm free to help. Just call me whenever." Seungho whispered, putting a concerned face.

Seriously? He's bribing me? I guess Sara wasn't lying.

"I don't need those." I said, irritated. and walked away. "Oh, and please prevent putting your nose in my business. If you're scared to lose against me, just say it." I told him, one last time before I complete left the school.

This is... my second attempt to run for a student council position at the school. The first attempt was memorable, though not very serious. Heeseung was with me, I recall, when he urged me to try at least being a secretary or a vice. He was the student council's president at our previous school. That's why he urged me to do it, but I lost. It didn't matter because I preferred losing than winning. Although, I'm more motivated to win now. I'm hoping.

Just as I was ready to leave the school, I bumped into Yoona.

"Jihyun." She called, "where are you going? Let's ride the bus together today." She continued.

"Oh, well, I was planning to visit... him today. sorry." I said to her, as she opened her mouth in realization.

"Oh! right, sure. no worries." She said, "Take care!" she added while we bid each other's goodbye.

After waiting for the bus again, I finally sat into the seat beside the window and inserted my earphones unto my ear. I stared at the sky, thinking. For the past eleven months, My life had become empty and dry. I started talking less... and I began spending less time outside. All I wanna do is lay on my bed and cry.

When I finally arrived at my destination, I quickly walked to the place where I'm going to meet him, It's almost on top of the hill.

I smiled when I saw him, His tomb rather.

There he was, My greatest love.

Heeseung Lee 이희승

Oct. 15, 1987 - Jan. 20, 2005

In loving remembrance of a bright soul. We will always carry your spirit in our hearts, Rest in eternal peace.

I put the tulips I bought just this morning, the Christmas letter I wrote yesterday and our polaroid with our picture together. Then I sat Infront of it and sighed.

"I'll... try to win for you, okay? I'll replace your position. So I can fulfill your plans." I told him, believing that he's just Infront of me right now, listening.

He was the school's only recent and... last president. So now, As my new school looks for a new one, I volunteered. So I can show the true being of what a leader is. Not someone who uses money for everything.

Heeseung demonstrated what a real leader is. He demonstrated his bravery and independence. Everyone adored him. especially me, naturally. He served as a dependable big brother figure for all of the students. The school had great faith in him. Even the guards, teachers, principal, and cleaning staff who loiter around the school. I could see his passion. How he handled being president so well. His project, his speeches, and his plans. His passion was evident to all.

Everything feels so fast... It's been 11 months already?

Why does everything feels just like yesterday?

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