#𝐃𝐎𝐘𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄, jobe bellingham

006. THE CAMELIA AFFECT

" my eyes don't shed tears, but boy,
they pour when
i'm thinkin' 'bout you, ooh no, no, no"

TRACK 006 :
thinkin bout you
— frank ocean ⊹ ࣪

first person

I ALWAYS HAD aviophobia — the fear of planes. But today, it was hitting harder than ever. The thought of being in the air always evoked intense anxiety, fear and nervousness for me and worse — panic. My mom is usually near me to comfort me but it was just me and my assistant, Emilia. I met Emilia in 2017 when my music was slowly getting somewhere. She was a necessity to me and I honestly doubt I would've made it to most of my events if it weren't for her. Emilia was kind of a family friend so when I first found out that she was my assistant, I was ecstatic. Her and my mom were a great pairing.

Emilia just came out of the bathroom. She sat in the seat next to me, analyzing one of feet that were moving due to anxiety. Her ability to read people's faces so well was underrated. It always felt like she was reading my mind. Her advice was unmatched compared to some of the people she knew in her life. If it was in a list it would be,

List of Best Advice Givers ??
1. Mom
2. Jobe
3. Emilia
4. Minnie
5. Jamira
6. Cristiano
7. Jace

It wasn't that Jace wasn't good at giving advice. It was just that I never really ran to him in that way yet. I usually go to Jobe whenever my life is in shambles to be fair.

"Are you okay, my love?" Emilia questioned as her eyebrows furrowed with a slight frown, and her eyes were widened . It was like a mix of concern and anticipation.
I didn't want her to get worried about anything. She was so excited to be on a plane with me alone and I want to take advice of that by doing something since her eyes are always glued to the laptop or the new book she's reading. I mean, that's fun and all, Virgin Suicides is a good book and has a great movie but, life is too short. I want her to let loose a little. I've never seen her crack a smile since 2017. There was this one time when I actually managed to get a side smirk appear on her face.

"Yes Em. You know what we should do? Listen to some music."
"No Cam. Aren't you feeling ill?"
"Look, the best way to cure ANY of my symptoms is music."  "Pleaseee?" I said with my best puppy dog eyes and as usual, they worked like a charm.

She sighed in annoyance and agreement causing me quickly sprint from my seat to the speaker that's on the table further away from us. I quickly connected my phone playing City Boys (i just love this song i can't help myself).

The song was a vibe. I knew that. She knew that. I held her hands and rose her up to at least move around. After a while, she then started to feel the song, I KNEW this was a moment to capture in the picture books. As the chorus played, Emilia started swaying from side to side, enjoy every second of the song. Then it happened. She smiled.

Her smile was all of the above — radiant, contagious, genuine, dazzling and enchanting. It felt as if the plane had been lit up. It captivated my heart seeing her smile. After everything, she deserved a break. This dance session lasted for a good while. They listened to Dancing Queen which was a recommendation from Emilia, Way 2 Sexy and some more old classics also recommended by Emilia.

After a few minutes, we finally got tired and slouched on the chairs, chugging on our waters. I don't know what was put in Em's water but, she wasted no time getting back up dancing to Michael Jackson song which clearly brought back nostalgia by the way she started dancing.