Thats Life

Chapter Seven

"All jokes aside, Tyson, I'm sorry for all the school and stupid jokes. I know the only reason you dropped out was because dad was getting psychotic, and mom was completely checking out. You had no choice, Suzie and I were still young, and you stepped up to take care of us. Thank you for that. I'm sorry it costed you your life and education."

I popped the bottle open, and against my better judgment and the shitty feeling in my stomach I took a drink. I suppose if this is all ending tonight, I might as well go out with a bang and enjoy myself one last time. I already threw up everything that was in my stomach previously which in turn of course costed me a good amount of my buzz. After downing a good amount, I toss the bottle into the trash on my way to the living room where they were both still arguing on the couch.

"Hey... guys" Wow, this is awkward. I silently curse Suzie for encouraging me to do this, I should have waited longer or maybe even just ignored it until it went away because I'm not entirely sure what I'm expected of right now.

They both turned to look my way, Will still crying and Tyson still lost about what to do with the whole situation. Not only do they have me, the emotional bomb with drug problems to deal with, but they also have the emotional damage I just caused everyone else to deal with as well. Tyson doesn't know how to talk to Will right now, we have never had to comfort each other.

I guess I'll just hop right on into it. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to blow up like that and tell you that killing myself was the goal of everything I've been doing these past few years." I look down at my feet trying to figure out exactly what I'm apologizing for. "Honestly, I am so sorry that all of this happened, I don't really have an excuse for any of it, but you guys and Suzie have nothing to do with it. I'm just... I'm a wreck and I guess tonight was my breaking point." it stayed quite for 3 seconds too long. "Oh and um not 6 years straight, and it was never anything heavy or hard core. I went through some times where I'd be sober for a few weeks at a time, sometimes a month... not that it matters, I just wanted to let you know." I bite my lip and look up waiting for a reaction or more yelling. I never considered my drug use a problem, not until about a year and a half ago. I wasn't doing stuff every day and didn't obsess about when the next time I'd get my hands on something would be. I'm not sure what happened to turn me into that person, but a year and a half ago it switched, and it turned into every day, all day long usually.

Will stood up and made his way towards me, I braced myself to get into another fight or for his words to come out and break me all over again, but before I felt any impact, his arms flew around my neck as he pulled me into his chest.

"You aren't like dad. I'm sorry that even came out of my mouth, I've never thought that ever, the whole drinking thing just kind of triggered me. You are an amazing person, I wish I could take all of that back" He sniffed a few times "Jace, I really am so sorry. I know we're brothers and we get into fights, and we hit each other and yell at each other and I promise you I have never had the thought about you and dad being the same in my head ever."

I pat his back a few times in appreciation before he starts again "I don't think I've ever hugged you like this before, but now I know I need to more often." His arms tighten around me.

Softly I pushed against his ribs to get him off of me "Yeah, let's not hug or make a habit of hugging. This is kind of weird" Both of us let out light chuckles.

"Well, I am glad we know there's a problem now with both your emotions and the drug thing. I'm glad I now know why you do so much 'homework' I wasn't sure what to do with the information you were giving us. But I knew you were acting different. So, knowing there's something wrong, that's a good step, what do you think the best course of action is to get you the help you need?" Tyson asked.