Deku's Secret Illness

Ch. 2

After leaving the doctor's office, Izuku walked the familiar halls of U.A. with a heavy heart. The weight of his diagnosis pressed down on him, the reality of it all settling deep into his soul. Each step felt labored. The walk felt like an eternity. He was lost in his mind, spiraling. He managed to do some research on his condition on the train ride home. It was fatal. He was going to die.

He couldn't help but catch the smiles of his classmates as he walked into the room. It hurt knowing that he had the power to shatter them.

That one wrong move and the smiles would disappear and he would be left with... well Izuku didn't know exactly what would happen but he imagined they would be looks of pity or disgust. That's how people usually reacted to his pain after all. In middle school, it was either pitying looks at his black eyes and broken bones or disgust at his utter uselessness, mixed with occasional glares of anger at his continued existence.

He wanted to believe they would care but care somehow hurt worse. He remembered what care looked like. It hadn't been that long ago that he had his mother's worried looks and helpless sobs. He had felt the same way when she was sick. He remembered what it was like to watch her slow decline. To watch her die a slow painful death. He wouldn't wish that on his worst enemy, but doing that to his friends?

He couldn't do it. He couldn't face them like this. The thought of them finding out was making him physically sick. Based on the worried looks of his peers he must have looked pretty sick too. He decided to use this to his advantage. He went to ask Aizawa to excuse him for a bit, but Aizawa noticed before he even spoke.

"Midoriya, are you alright? You look a bit sick"

Izuku tried to speak but the words were caught in his throat. He just shook his head.

"I'm sending you to Recovery Girl. Do you need someone to accompany you to her office?"

He shook his head again, unable to form the words, tears threatening to spill from his glazed-over eyes.

"Ok. You're excused for the rest of the day. Just go get checked out then get some rest. You look like you need it."

Midoriya nodded gratefully then stumbled out of the classroom and into the hall.

He didn't go to recovery girl. Instead, he ducked into the nearest bathroom, locking himself in one of the stalls.

The weight of the world crashed down on him, and he crumpled to the ground, body shaking with suppressed sobs. The anguish he had held inside burst forth like a flood, shoulders heaving with each tearful gasp. He mourned the life he had envisioned, dreams now tainted by an unforgiving reality.

"Why... why does it have to be like this?" he whispered through choked sobs. "I wanted to be a hero, to save others... but now I can't even save myself."

His hope flickered in the wind. Fear threatened to consume him, and all he wanted to do was to let someone pull him out of the cold and shield him from the storm. But the faces of his friends flashed through his mind, their unconditional support, their stubborn belief in him. "How can I face them knowing what I know? How can I watch them suffer because of me?"

He couldn't bring himself to tarnish their hopes and dreams with the harsh reality he faced.

Then there was Kacchan. Kacchan was like a brother to him. They had spent their whole lives together. How would he take this? They had just mended their friendship too. How cruel is fate that the second he was given a chance to make amends it was taken away?

Through his tears, Izuku forced himself to his feet. He drew a shaky breath, determined to face his inevitable doom alone. He forced a mask of determination back on his face, concealing the cracks in his heart.