BROKEN FOREVER - Mason Freeland and Evie Zamora

31 | YOU'LL BE OKAY

My suspension is over, i was able to go back to school. Usually when a boy get suspended for fighting with someone, he'll go back to school with one target, a payback for the reason he got the suspension. but i didn't even though about him. I couldn't care less about him right now,

And if I'm being honest, i wasn't able to think of anyone or anything at all right now.

We both went to school today, i knew i cant focus on anything, or behave normally, but i had to go.
i was afraid of something that will upset me and I'll lose it, everything in the last few days is just annoying me so much. i hope Tracy will be okay, i can't imagine how is it to act normal when you hide something like that. i still didn't told mom.

i know it's wrong I'm not telling. but I promised her. And I know it's stupid because this is something serious, but I don't know how to tell her that. She would die. i had this responsibility but I don't know what to do with it.

Sometimes I need to remind myself im young for this either, but it's so hard.

—are you okay?— i texted Tracy. i knew it's going to be a hard day for her after what happened with Evie. I just don't want her to suffer anymore.

I've seen her today, with a frozen face walking in the path, everyone is around her greeting her and waving at her, she's not doing anything but smile.

—yeah. have u seen this truck too?—

Evie, Astrid and Medina took off on a red open truck with everyone, all the boys is yelling and they're laughing like they're having the best time.
Tracy stayed there, they didn't told her anything.

I'm glad she didn't go, but that hurts. That girl was eating from our table and was sometimes sleeping in our mother's bed. she need to be ashamed because this behaviour is fucking unacceptable. I know I would be ashamed.

—don't mind that, you need to be glad you were not on it.— it's not gonna make her feel better, but I tried. Evie just shocked me.

"Tracy go with them?" Rafa asked, seems worried. I'm not used to see him so serious.
"Uh no. They didn't told her they're going."
"She knows it's a good thing right?" That made me smile. Noticing he's actually growing up.

"I hope she knows. I'm glad they didn't asked her." We kept talking about it, and I told him about Evie. His mouth was still open,

"Bull. I can't believe that man, how you didn't told me?" I felt he's offended. He's not like that usually, but I really did took a step back from everyone. I was so deep down in this that I forgot about everything. I felt really bad.

"Yeah man. I'm sorry, my mind was away recently. I should've tell you." I sighed.
"No that okay. Now man up." He laughed and reminded me he's the same Rafa. But I love him that way. He's the funniest guy I know.

"I gotta go, but call me dude. We'll do something." He shook my hand and left.

We got back home and Tracy flipped again. These mood changes are so exhausting but who I am to tell her anything after what happened.

we need to accept it, even if she's acting like she used to act. And even when it's after we thought something had changed, "I have a client, Tracy."

Mom asked her to act properly. The fact she don't know about anything make me feel like a screw up bad son. But I don't know how she would react. I don't know what would happen.

Dealing with Tracy  today was really hard, but I didn't felt anything. Not what I was feeling in the begging that for sure. She was angry but i wasn't able to even urge with her. I just let her do whatever she wanted, without saying a word.

|🚬|

Another day in school, trace got in to one of the classes for a conversation with ms Flores. I hope it's not something serious, we can't take another fall right now. I waited outside of the class,

She walked out without facing me after two minutes, I followed her fast. I called her and she didn't stopped, "Trac-Tracy! what happened?" I held her shoulders when I finally stopped her.

"They're holding me back. I'm staying in the seventh grade." She seems so sad and ashamed.
I looked at her clueless. At that point I didn't know what to do, or what to say.

I wasn't expected that, and I knew that's going to stay with her everywhere she'll go from now on.

"What am I supposed to do now? My life is ruined." We left the school. She was supposed to go somewhere, she didn't mentioned where.
I tried to calm her down, but what are you supposed to say in a situation like that?

I'm sick of being the one who need to help all the time. Tracy is half of me, she is. But I can't handle everything and i feel like I'm about to choke. Like too many things is happening, and I can't deal with it anymore. I know she's dealing with way more, but sometimes i feel like there's no more air in my lungs. Like I'm drowning.

She was quite most of the time. After a couple of minutes we were walking, a car stopped near us.
That was Brady, waiting for us to get in.

"Come on, mom sent me to pick you up."

"What's going on, I'm supposed to be studying at yumi's house." She said. It's been a while since I heard her name coming from Tracy.

"Uh, i don't think so. Pop in." He opened the door. Tracy got in and sat next to him, I sat in the back. We entered our neighbourhood and i swear it was never so quiet. Tracy waved at Rose. An old friend of the family, our neighbour for years.
She stopped sweep the grass and got inside.

Tracy's look broke me. I couldn't believe she just ignored her after all this years. Tracy was her favorite girl. Brady stopped by our yard.
"You'll be okay." We knew he's hiding something,