Church, 404, Tucker, and Caboose are standing on top of Blue Base.
Church: Let me get this straight.. You gave this guy our flag?
Caboose: Is that bad?
Church: Bad? Oh no, that's not bad. Next time he comes over, why don't you just help him blow up the whole goddamn base?
Tucker: There, there he is.
Church: (Looking through the sniper rifle) Where? Oh, yeah, oh, I got him. He's sneaking around back behind the cliffs.
Tucker: He must be one smart son of a bitch.
404: No, he's not. He came right in the back entrance like an idiot.
Cut to Donut looking around the canyon.
Donut: Oh, man, I am so freakin' lost. Where the hell is the base?
Cut to Church, 404, Tucker, and Caboose.
Church: Oh, shit... Hey Tucker, look at his armor. It's red.
Tucker: Oh man, that means it's their Sergeant.
Church: Well, that makes sense. At least now we know how he got by our defenses.
Caboose: Uh, you know.. he came in the back door where you guys were standing.
404: Guys seriously, he's clearly just a rookie himself
Tucker: Yeah, okay, well let's take him out then.
Church: Roger that. Okay, say goodnight, Sarge.
404: WAIT-
Cut to Donut as Church shoots four times but misses.
Donut: (crouching) Son of a bitch!
The squad watched the aftermath of Church's wild shots unfold with varying expressions.
Church: Aw crap.
Silence.
More silence.
Church: (turns to Tucker and 404) ...What?
Tucker: You're REALLY not very good with that thing, are you?
404: Seriously, how did ANY of you lot make it into the army? No offense sirs, but this outfit is a complete joke.
Cut to blues.
Tucker: Oh great, now he's taunting us. That's just embarrassing.
Church: Alright, that's it, I've had it. Rookie, you stay here. Me and Tucker, we'll head through the teleporter, we'll cut him off at the pass. Courier, keep an eye on him so he doesn't screw anything else up.
Caboose: Right!
404: You got it, sir.
Church: Tucker, you ready? Let's go.
Tucker: There is no way I'm going through that thing.
Church: Tucker, we don't have time for this. Why would they give us a teleporter if it doesn't work?
Tucker: I don't know, why would they give us a tank that no one can drive?
Church: We already tested the teleporter, remember?
Tucker: We threw rocks through it!
Church: Yeah, and, so what? The rocks came out the other side, didn't they?
Tucker: Yeah, but they were all hot and covered with black stuff.
Church: Oh, so I guess that's what this is all about then. You're afraid of a little black stuff.
Tucker: Yes. I am. I am afraid of black stuff.
Church: Tucker, I almost hate to do this to you. (Raising his gun at Tucker)
Tucker: You wouldn't...
Church: You know, I look at it this way: Either A, we go through there and get the flag back, or B, we stay here and I get to kill you. Either way, I win.
Tucker: For the record, I want you to know, rocks aren't people.
Church: Duly noted. Now get in there.
Tucker: Crap... Alright. One, two...
Tucker runs through and doesn't appear on the other side.
Caboose: ...Huh, he didn't come out the other side...
Beside him, 404 scrutinized the contraption warily.
404: Hard to say where he might've gotten off to...
Church: Yeeaahhh, I've uh- I've decided I'm not gonna use the teleporter.
Church runs off the base to chase Donut.
Church: Okay, you two stay here! I'll be back with the flag!
404: Reminding myself - avoid teleporters at all costs. Nothing but trouble...
Cut to Reds
Simmons: I still have no idea what you're talking about. I didn't hear any shots.
Grif: (Sighs) I'm telling you, it was four shots. Like bam, bam, bam.
Simmons: Wait a second, that's only three bams.
Grif: Bam. (Sees Church through a sniper rifle) Wait a second, we've got a Blue guy on the move out there.
Simmons: Where's he headed?
Grif: (Looks to the left) Oh crap. It... It's Donut. And he's got something... (Zooms in) It looks like... (Sees that it's the Blue's flag)...Simmons, get the Warthog.
Simmons: Heh, you mean the Puma?
Grif: Yeah, keep making jokes. That'll win the war.
YOU ARE READING
Red vs Blue (Season One) | A Courier Guy (Male Oc)
RandomHave you ever wondered why a courier is here? That's a 404 question too. 404 is a courier whose job was to deliver packages for the Private Church, but something went wrong that made 404 stay there. 404 and some other original characters belong to m...
