To the Sun, To the Stars, To the Sky

9: When It Catches Up

Will POV

Oh, shit.

That was intense. I was paralyzed as the two went back and forth and as I sensed both of their anger growing. Ten read off lines he'd memorized, but his eyes were dark and his hands repeatedly clenched and unclenched. He was trying to keep his expression neutral, but every so often something would slip through. He was enraged by our constant desire to break him off from the rules he longed to follow, and Thalia was completely oblivious. I had tried to help them both out, but I quickly realized I wasn't helping either of them and stopped. Thalia, however, went on until she reached Ten's breaking point.

"My name is Nico di Angelo, by the way," He yelled back at us as he stormed off into the forest. "Let's see if my name gets a grave to accompany it when I'm gone."

I stood up immediately. Thalia grabbed my arm, still fuming. "Don't go after him. If he hates this all so much, let him go."

I pushed her off. "I won't make him come back if he's really that uncomfortable, but I have to make sure he's okay. And I have to make sure he doesn't go back to the army."

I chased after him and found him hacking at a tree with his knife. He tensed when he heard me coming, and quickly got down to one knee, hand at his chest.

"Break form, Ten-Seventeen," I said as I sat by him. He blew out a breath and switched his position to sitting with his left arm propping himself up.

"I apologize for yelling at you and the other leader, your majesty. I overstepped my rank again."

I leaned against the tree. "You didn't overstep anything, Nico."

He went rigid. Silence.

"You really think they're going to find a way to hurt you within the month?"

He worked his jaw. "I—I'm sorry for making you feel bad about this, Wi—your majesty. I know you're just trying to help. It shouldn't be something you have to worry about."

"You changed the subject," I observed.

He looked up at the sky for a moment. "Yes, I think this will all catch up to me by the end of the month. I'm waiting for it, actually. It's like⁠—it's like if someone told you that a drink was poison, and you keep drinking it anyway, each day, and you know it's going to catch up to you at some point, and then when other people look at the drink, they tell you it's just water. But you know it's not and you know you shouldn't have drunk it." He took a deep breath. "It—it's overwhelming, your majesty. At this point, the army was easier than this. I don't know which rules I'm supposed to follow, and I don't know how I should be acting around any of you. I—My goal was never to live like you want me to, Prince. My goal is just to survive and it always has been, and now everyone I meet seems to think it never should've been my goal in the first place."

I looked at him. His eyes were on his hands, fidgeting with the end of his sleeve. It was weird to see him looking like this, almost vulnerable. One of the last adjectives I'd use to describe this boy normally would be vulnerable, but now it seemed to be a defining characteristic. "Maybe it shouldn't be your goal."

He finally looked over at me, eyes desperate. He needed me to understand him, and I wasn't sure I could. "But it's all that kept me alive, Will—shit, your majesty. It's the only reason I'm still here."

I took his hands. "But you don't have the same obstacles that you did before. You don't have to worry about the same things. The army—you're not a part of it anymore."

He was silent, looking away from me again. I was losing him; I had to take things slower. I was causing some of the overwhelmingness he'd talked about earlier. That poison. I need to stop asking so much so quickly. Maybe then I'll make progress.

"But I understand what you're trying to say," I continued. "And we'll try to help you out more. No more trying to get you to break rules you're afraid to break, and no more calling you Ten when you don't want to be. I apologize for all of us."

"Thank you, your majesty." His voice shook as he spoke. He blew out another slow breath. "So how angry is Thalia with me?"

I shrugged. "I don't think she's angry at you, per se, she's just upset seeing all of this in full force again. You know, she would've probably met Reyna soon after Reyna got out of the army, and I think Thalia's just realizing we're going to have to go through all of this again. She's just frustrated."

He huffed, "Yeah, with me since I'm not learning quick enough."

"No, just at the people who made you feel unsafe if you didn't follow these rules." I sighed. "We should probably go back to the camp or someone's going to worry. And besides, the picnic is waiting."

As we returned to camp, he whispered almost inaudibly, "Maybe, if I follow the other rules, it wouldn't quite be the end of the world if you called me Nico."

I smiled.

He looked at me through the side of his eye as we joined Thalia again, and he was quiet throughout the picnic, only adding a comment or laughing at the occasional joke. We gossiped, and he joined in. We talked about Reyna's assistant, Octavian, who had just returned from a battle another camp had gone into. We talked about the small rumours that a spy was among us. Thalia teased me about liking Nico, which made Nico laugh or blush, depending on what she'd said. And by the end of the meal, he was relaxed and had a small smile on his face again.

The soldier was finally healing.

Word count: 1021