COMING OF AGE | Nishimura Riki

039 | once a lifetime

sato mai 
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I haven't seen the queen since the funeral. Ni-ki believes she is with her parents, taking a short break from her home with too many heartbreaking memories. Which means Ni-ki and I have the Royal Castle for ourselves if you don't count the servants.

We don't know when the queen is coming back. But what we do know is that once she comes back, Ni-ki's coronation will have an official date. Whenever I look at Ni-ki, I can't help but think about the mindset I have had for the past decade. I have spent a decade despising him and his family. Ni-ki had done nothing wrong, but I still didn't like him due to his blood.

Honestly. I feel bad for having so much hatred towards him when he had done nothing at all. After Ni-ki opened up to me about his relationship with his father, I realized I had seen him in the same way I didn't want others to see me. Because I am the daughter of a criminal, people immediately assume I'm gonna follow in his footsteps.

No wonder why I felt so safe and comfortable with Ni-ki. We may not have been through the same experiences, but we have been through similar experiences. Does that make sense? I know I will never meet someone who fully understands me and I am fine with that. I already have Ni-ki who understands me enough and I don't need anything or anyone else.

Having someone in your life who knows you, accepts you, and understands you is such a beautiful thing to have.

The relationship between Ni-ki and I have never been addressed. Saying we are friends feels like an understatement when it's obvious we are more than just friends. Whatever we are, I'm grateful for having Ni-ki in my life. Someone only met once in a lifetime.

"Are you sure about this?" I asked Ni-ki.

"I wouldn't have agreed to do this if I wasn't sure" Ni-ki answered.

"I know. I'm just scared. A lot of unsolved problems have come in the way and stopped me from seeing my Mom. I'm scared that my Mom has to face my problems too" I said.

"Whatever you have faced and will face, I will be there to protect you. I'm not gonna leave and take one step back, I will be there and take two steps forward" Ni-ki replied as he held my hand.

"Thank you. I know you are there. I just can't help but be worried whenever it's someone related to my family" I responded.

I miss my Mom a lot these days. All I have wanted is to see her but I have not been to due to fear of involving her in my problems. I chose to take distance from her to protect her even if it was breaking my heart.

It was hard to fall asleep at night because I kept getting worried if something had happened to her. Or worse, if the Grim Reaper had paid a visit. Losing my Mom shortly after losing my Dad would tear me down. And I wouldn't be able to put back the broken pieces.

The driver parked in front of Mom's hospital. Ni-ki got out first, held up the car door while I put my hood on, and then walked out.

Even if I have Ni-ki by my side, the police are probably still after me. Yet, I still decided to visit my Mom, risking letting the police know my information and having my Mom involved in all of this. Is this selfish? Probably.

"Do you know this hospital is a scam?" Ni-ki asked.

"I know. But it's the only hospital I can afford" I answered and then walked in.

Ni-ki caught up to my speed and walked in first. His entrance made everyone freeze, stand up, and bow. The staff seemed very nervous due to the crown prince's sudden appearance.

"We are here to write off one of the patients" Ni-ki said as he walked up to the information desk.

"What are you doing?" I whispered to him and I tried to stop him.

I looked around and noticed everyone was staring at us. They whispered, judging us with their eyes, and pretending to look at their phone even though it was obvious they were filming.

Ni-ki started to look around too. Did he not think people were going to stare at us?

"We will come back later" Ni-ki told the actuary.

He took my hand and walked away. To my surprise, he walked in the right direction. As if he knew where my Mom's room was. Even though I still wanted to question Ni-ki's sudden behavior, I decided to stay silent. The only thing I can focus on right now is meeting my Mom.

I knocked on the door before I walked in. Mom was lying down on her bed as usual. I feared that the next time I was gonna meet her she would be in pain, but she seemed better than the last time I saw her. Despite that, I still couldn't help but feel the tears in my eyes as I looked at her. She reminds me too much of Dad.

"Hi, Mom. How are you? You look lovely today" I said as I sat down on the chair next to her bed.

"I do? I don't remember what I look like. It's been a long time since I last saw my reflection" My mom replied.

"You brought another handsome man with you?" She asked and looked over at Ni-ki.

Ni-ki walked up to us and sat down on the other chair. It's a bittersweet moment to hear her talking about Dad like that. She remembers him. Not as her husband and the father of her daughter, but at least she remembers him.

"It's lovely to finally meet you, Mrs. Sato" Ni-ki said.

"Who are you?" My Mom asked.

"I am.." Ni-ki answered but looked at me before finishing the answer.

Ni-ki doesn't seem to know either what we are. The chances are that he is feeling the same as me. That we are more than just friends, it just has never been addressed and confirmed.

"My boyfriend" I answered for him as I smiled. Ni-ki smiled back, not that his face looked like a tomato.