Starblush Book 1 - Snaking Shadows

Prologue

Gravel crunched somewhere nearby and my eyes shot open. I held my breath praying that it was nothing but a stray dog or some other animal sniffing around for food. Tension crackled through my taught frame until it felt like the tips of my fur were standing up with static. I glanced up – the sky was even darker now and I could smell the tell tail signs of coming rain – the distant rumble of thunder already muttering away over the woods, seeming to echo my discomfort of being caught in wolf form out in the open instead of being safely hidden among trees and undergrowth with sand and soil under my paws. I swivelled my ears, scanning for any sound of pursuit – nothing. Muscles and tender bones protesting, I climbed to all fours, pressing myself to the wall beside me for support and flicked my eyes up and down the long-abandoned street. The mere lack of sight and sound made me uneasy, and a lump grew in my throat. My destination was straight ahead, but I couldn't make myself break from my cover and make a dash for it. Paranoia scampered around in my belly like a mouse looking for a way out and I wished I could stomp down on it with a heavy paw so that it could stop gnawing at my nerves. Taking a deep breath, and throwing another nervous glance up and down the street, I limped forward. My muscles snarled at me, but I tried my best to set my large paws down soundlessly. My goal was to make it as near to the edge of the woods before being spotted and only then if I had no choice – make a run for it. I was lucky that most of the street lamps in this part of town had breathed their last breaths long ago and that no one had bothered fixing them. There were still a few stubborn ones though, like the one right between me and my destination. To a human, that single light in a long-abandoned street would seem like a beacon of hope and safety. To me however – it seemed like a death sentence waiting to be delivered. I glared at the lamp where it stood high above the ground propped safely on its perch, looking much more judgemental than an inanimate object had any right to, and willed it to give up and fizzle out already. If I crossed anywhere near its harsh glow I would surely be spotted. The sound of heavy boots came from up ahead on my side of the road and I froze, sinking as far into the little cover the slim shadow beside the wall provided. Panic tightened like silver claws around my frozen heart as a flashlight illuminated the wall on the other side of the road. I wanted to sink further into the wall, but there was no room. My heart thumped so loudly I swore that even a human could hear it, and I looked down at my paws, worrying for the first time if my fur colour was even hidden in the shadows I clung to. My front paws were dark, possibly black, with strange smudge like markings running up my legs in a starry blue colour. My breath caught, at the beauty of my paws and I wondered what the rest of my body looked like – with a pang I wondered if I would even live long enough to see what my wolf form looks like. A man stepped out from an alleyway and onto the sidewalk I was standing on, then walked out into the middle of the road as he scanned the opposite sidewalk with that forsaken flashlight. No, not a man, he was only a boy, maybe a year or two older than me. The yellow light from the street lamp illuminated his features, though with my superior sight I already recognized him before he stepped into the light. He was the one who exposed me at the coffee shop earlier by slipping a silver coin into my hand with a tip after I had cleared his table. The silver had burned upon contact with my bare skin and I had dropped the tip and the coin like he had put a burning coal in my palm. Even now, after the torture that is shifting into wolf form for the first time, I could still feel the circle and design burned into the pad of my right front paw. I hoped that he would just keep walking, that he would be so intent on his search on the other side of the street the he would forget about the side I was on— but that hope was destroyed when he swung the light in my direction. I winced, the light stinging my eyes. The young hunter froze once his eyes landed on me. Suppressing the overwhelming urge to duck and run away with my tail between my legs, I drew back my lips, and let a threatening rumble build its way from my chest and up my throat, I was a wolf – time to start acting like one. The fur on my back rippled, bristling and reacting to the slight breeze that blew from behind me –the gentle brush of nature's touch against the sensitive and aggravated hairs boosting my confidence. The boy stepped back, seemingly unsure for a moment as we locked eyes. I wasn't what he expected to find. He was no doubt counting on finding a scared thirteen-year-old girl curled up crying in and out cove somewhere. Too bad I left that little girl behind at the back door of that coffee shop. Studying the confusion in the boy's eyes before me, I briefly wondered if he even knew it was me standing before him. I could swear my four-legged form was much bigger than the average newly shifted werewolf. My gaze flickered towards the patch of woods I could spy down the road, the patch of sanctuary that had evaded me when the change overcame me. The boy wasn't entirely in my way, maybe I could make it if I could distract him somehow, but I wasn't going to be ignorant enough to think I could dodge bullets. I could see his hand twitching towards his hip, he was clearly armed. A fifteen-year-old boy carrying a weapon might not sound like the biggest cause for concern to most, but our kinds knew each other. He was a hunter and had probably been handed a gun the moment he could hold a rattle and not hit himself in the head with it. His eyes flicked to the woods behind him, then back at me. He was wary of me and knew he was in my way. The sent of his fear reached me and sent a spark of excitement through my body, lending me strength and energy I badly needed. Straightening my legs, I brought myself to my full height, and took two deliberate steps towards the hunter. My joints shook a little but I wagged my tail slowly behind me and lowered my head to make it look like I was some kind of crazed animal. His eyes widened and he grabbed for his weapon. Gathering strength in my haunches I leapt towards him, letting out a guttural snarl. The burnt pad of my front paw skidded on the rough tarred surface of the road as my full weight landed, grit and sharp stones digging into the wound. I yelped, jerking my paw off the ground. The hunter fell back, landing on his butt and scrabbled for whatever weapon he had dropped, a look of recognition coming over his feature. Before he could aim a weapon at me, I had spun around heading for the woods as fast as my limping form could carry me, casting an ominous black shadow as I ran under the street lamp. A click sounded behind me and something cut into my shoulder as I ran and I yelped, nearly tripping over my own paws. I didn't need to throw a glance over my shoulder to see what it was, I could already feel the sedative spreading through my bloodstream. I kicked off harder with my back paws, pushing through the heaviness that began to cast its shadow over me like a stifling blanket. My eye lids drooped and my steps became more hesitant and clumsier but I kept going. It felt like I was running in slow motion, but I eventually made it into the tree line. I could hear shouting behind me, but I was too numb to understand what it meant. A shrill ringing started up in my ears, first from one direction, then another, and another. Part of me knew what it meant, I knew I had learned about all the weapons hunters used on my kind, but my brain sat heavy and silent feeling like a rock atop my head. My steps slowed to a trot. Disorientation came over me like a stomach flu and I felt sick. I could have stopped running all together, and I wouldn't have known otherwise. Everything looked the same, shadows, trees, dirt, undergrowth – I couldn't remember how I got here. I stumbled and hit the ground with a thump, my front legs bending painfully as I landed on then. My head felt like it was slipping from my neck and I couldn't keep it upright. Shaking it furiously I pushed to my paws and stumbled a few more steps. I blinked slowly turning my head this way and that, trying to make sense of my situation. Something was urging me to keep going, but I couldn't remember why. I kept walking, not having the strength to do anything more than to prowl forward on autopilot. I had a strange feeling that I wasn't alone. I could feel aggressive presences' moving towards me, pressing in closer and closer, surrounding me on all sides— and something else. A warm sensation touched the fur on my flank, a constant weight against my skin like some wolf was walking beside me and holding me upright. A distant memory of a dark place with two distinct heartbeats filled my ears, I had the feeling that one was my own, it was louder and I could feel it pounding in my chest. A warm milky scent and my mothers voice seemed to whisper over my ear fur and nose but I couldn't fathom for what reason I would have to be thinking of my pack or family right now. They had lied to me, everything I had ever believed had been one big fairy-tale, one I wished had been true. The warmth against my flank pressed closer and a feeling that there might be more my family had lied about crawled up my spine and clung there like a bur. Anger fuelled my stride and my steps became more deliberate, though I still didn't know where I was going.

Shadows swamped my vision, but it didn't feel like my eyes were clouding over – it felt like the shadows were swirling around inside me – as if my blood was a pool cast in the shadow of a tree with its branches dancing in the wind.

A flickering ballet of black shadow and crimson blood. A bone chilling hiss like snarl stalked from between my bared fangs, a haunting sound that spoke of so many emotions. Betrayal, despair, loneliness, being lost, feeling scared, confusion, self-preservation and so many more. A sound that I knew came from no ordinary werewolf. The shadows consumed me, slowing my heart and suffocating my lungs. The scents of burnt fur, charred flesh and steaming blood filled my nose. A tightness spread over my shoulders and sticky blood plastered the fur that remained there. The taste of fresh blood leaked onto my tongue, and I gagged, my stomach turning on its axels. Lashing out, I grasped for anything to hold on to, anything to keep me from this nightmare – but there was nothing. I was falling. A sense of weightlessness came over me and my chest hollowed out. My back hit the ground with a hard thud and I gasped, shooting to a sitting position. Breathing harshly and heart hampering, my nails dug into soft fabric and I looked around wildly. The memories of the day replayed in my mind. I was in my alpha's office – had I fallen asleep on the couch again? Guilt swamped me as I looked around, taking in the disarray of scattered papers and empty coffee mugs and dishes scattered across the desks and coffee table. That guilt subsided just a little when I caught sight of the sleeping lump on the couch across from me, his reading lamp still on. Seemed the same fate had overcome him— served us right for pulling an all-nighter for the fourth time this week. Rubbing my palms over my eyes I stiffly got to my feet and walked to the still open window. The fresh late winter air brought clarity to my tired mind. It also brought back the dream that had woken me. Sickness crept up my neck and goose bumps formed on the sides of my face. Tears pricked at my eyes as nausea swept through me, leaving me shivering in fear. "It was just a dream", I told myself, except I knew that was a lie. It was a memory – one I could never outrun, no matter how hard I tried. Realising that I was hugging myself I set my hands on the cool wooden frame of the windowsill, gripping it tightly and looked back at the man sleeping peacefully, with his glasses askew and button up shirt unkempt. "I could keep running", I thought, but this pack needed me, and I needed them. They were my family now, and I would do anything to keep my family safe. Taking a deep breath – I pulled the scents of my home, my pack into my lumps – keeping it there for as long as I could. I set first one foot on the windowsill and then the other. I could keep running, but I won't. I launched myself out the window, propelling myself forward as if I was diving into a swimming pool. Shifting effortlessly in mid-air and landing on all fours three stories down, ankle deep in soft snow. I took off running, not having a destination in mind, just letting the night pull me in and my desires drive me forward, snow flying in my wake. My dreams had been haunted by what happened to me that night for long enough. Maybe it was time I became the monster in their dreams instead.