Alex's POV:
Bitch I woke up and the world chose violence. So me and my doners were eating dinner, when Cinderella's fairy said 'Bibity Bobity Boo, you get bad luck because I hate you' , and magically marine hoes (everyone's mortal enemy) came in and pretty much said 'Listen up hoes our lives aren't pretty enough to fuck up so we choose to fuck up yours, because why not'.
Those rats.
Anygays..
Them hoes shot the doners, and they died with a pretty flash. Then they tried to bomb the fucking house,and turn me into a sack of potatoes.
Keyword:tried.
Those dumbasses had the Reaper against them, shot the bazooka, and instead of me dying, the Reaper decided that I wasn't a good enough soul to harvest and turned the bazooka towards the marines. Anyways the bazooka shot them,and they became tomato soup.Funny as hell. I sat there laughing my ass off till reinforcements came.
While running I swear I became the new fucking Kizaru with how fast I was running, like goddamn, I really could replace him, easily.
But of course,me being an insomniac (and dumbass), didn't sleep for the last three days.So my brain eventually said 'Fuck you', I short circuited, and went to fucking sleep.
When I woke up I was on this old man's shoulder. Took me a little but I realized he was,'Garp the Fist,Hero of the Navy',hero my ass.Roger was better.
"Hey can you let me down shitty old hero." I asked politely (I think).
"No." This bitch.
"That's gay." ULTIMATE COMEBACK. hehehe.
"I'm gay." Oh-
Unless you say that..I don't judge.I mean you do you boo.
"And you're just now telling me this."
"Yes?"
"You're an idiot."
"Wait if one of your family members were gay what would you do?" I have to see if he's a good sibling or whatever (I need blackmail).
"I'd give 'em a huge ass speech on how if anybody tells them if they're disgusting for being gay, kick them in the dick, or if they're a woman punch them in the tits."
Damn. I don't even have tits and that hurts. The phantom pain is too much.
"As you should."
"Right?".....
Silence.
Don't worry, I can bring this back to life.
"Hey old man, who would you ship your child with?"
"Definitely his right hand man, Ivankov." Bitch I know an Ivankov...Is he done did talkin about my Revolutionary Sugar Mommy.
If that's true then..
"OH MY LORD IS YOUR SON DRAGON?!?!" What, I'm a fan.
"Yes." LET'S GOOOO.
"Tell him I'd give him head." I gotta stop saying my thoughts out loud...
"...What?..." Understandable reaction.
"Tell him I'd give him lead." It rhymes at least, right?
"What the hell are you talking about?" That's what I'm trying to figure out, sir.
"Just ignore me." Please,please,please don't think about what I said.
"By the way, I got way too off topic, WHERE IN THE EVER LOVING SHIT OF CHICKEN NUGGETS ARE YOU TAKING ME?!"
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ASL's Older Brother
FanfictionAlex, a man that seems like he's on drugs, and has a devil druit makes a new family, after his died in a buster call on his island. Secrets and bonding shall occur in Alex's and his three little brother's life's. But what happens when everything goe...
