The Face Behind The Mask

39

That voice. That horrid voice, shrill, sharp, penetrating. He couldn't stand it. The louder she cawed the angrier he became. He felt a little stab under his ribcage.

It'll go away. If you think about it, it gets worse.

He buckled his belt and shoved his closet door closed. "What?" he hollered.

"Your lunch is ready," she said and then paused expecting an answer. There was no answer. "I could bring it up for you. If you want."

"I'll be down in a minute." He went to the window and peeked out through the dusty miniblinds. He knew he heard a door slamming. It was the neighbor lady across the street. It was a wonder he could hear anything out there with those damn kids playing street hockey day and night.

Clack! Clack! Their stupid plastic hockey puck knocked against the curbs, then bounced back against their hockey sticks. Over and over and over and over.

Don't they ever get sick of whacking that piece of plastic back and forth?

He looked up the street at the row of parked cars and when he turned his head to look in the other direction, his glasses banged into the miniblinds. He pushed them back into place on his face as the blinds swung back and forth in front of the window.

His anxiety had been raging ever since that McKenzie girl got away.

She tricked you. She made a fool out of you. God dammit! What did she tell them? You dumbass. You know what she said. She gave them your description. Of course, she did. She told them what you look like. She told them what you said.

He shot her up with 500 milligrams. Probably more. Maybe she can't remember what she saw. It was dark. Really dark. His facial tic came on strong three times in rapid succession. It always happened when he got nervous. Or angry. Or tired.

But leaving her phone. That was stupid. That was really dumb. "I'm not stupid," he grumbled. It was a careless thing to do leaving it at that restaurant. That was a big mistake. Those damn boys. Assholes. They got him all riled up.

He wanted to wait out in the parking lot for those jokers and crack their thick skulls when they came out of the restaurant. They were mean. They hurt him and called him names. He hated that. People shouldn't be allowed to get away with that.

You guys think you're tough? Actions have consequences, you assholes.

Three grimaces in a row.

"Your lunch is getting cold," she called from the first floor.

"I said I'll be right down!" Damn her.

He took another quick peek through the mini blinds. Even if the girl could provide a description, the police didn't have anything. He was careful. He wore gloves. He didn't leave anything behind. Except for that phone.

Damn it.

Three deep grimaces in a row.

That pain beneath his ribcage felt sharper this time. He pulled out his old wooden desk chair and sat, slumping forward, legs crossed awkwardly at his ankles. He removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes. He swallowed, thinking about her phone.

He took a gray tarnished butter knife from his desktop and grabbed a Handi-Snacks pack, the plastic wrap peeled back. He scraped a dollop of cheese spread from its plastic compartment and brought it to his mouth. As he savored the chemical-infused cheese product, he stared at the stained, threadbare throw rug at his feet, a few crumpled balls of facial tissue scattered about. He took a deep breath. He should get some sleep but when he laid on his lumpy mattress at night, sleep wouldn't come. Maybe his mind had forgotten how to slow down and go to sleep. It was the anxiety. If he could make the anxiety go away he'd be able to sleep.

He raised his head and looked at the closet door. His face sagged and his shoulders drooped.

"Do you want your lunch or do you want me to–"

"I'll be right down!" he shouted.

........

Brick poked his head into his sister's room and found her at her desk typing on her laptop. The afternoon sun was working to force its way through the blinds covering her window.

"Hey," he said quietly.

She glanced over her shoulder. "Oh. Hey."

"Okay if I come in?"

She shrugged, slowly spinning her seat to face him. He entered and sat on the corner of her bed.

"Totally sucks not having a phone," she grumbled.

He nodded. There was a long, uncomfortable pause before he said, "So, I mean... what... what actually happened?"

She responded initially with angry eyes that softened at his sincerity.

Brick was hoping for just the tiniest of smiles. Not a joyful smile but a smile of acknowledgment. He didn't expect to see the full dimpled gleaming Kelsey McKenzie smile but he wanted to see that she still had it in her. That happiness was possible. He lowered his voice, embarrassed. "I mean, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. It's just that Mom and Dad won't tell me anything."

She let out a long sigh almost like she wasn't aware the air was escaping from her lungs. "I don't remember a whole lot. I feel like I... Can't even... think, you know?"

He nodded not sure he understood what she meant.

"I remember feeling someone coming up behind me. I had my music playing but I could feel him, you know, behind me."

Brick nodded again.

"I pulled out my bud and then." She winced at the memory. "I got jabbed." She rubbed her shoulder muscle. "It was strong, hit me super fast."

"You mean like some kind of drug or something?"

"And then I think... I kinda remember the guy put a bag or a pillowcase or something over my head. Everything went totally black and I could hardly breathe... And then he shoved me into his car. Yeah, he got my hands and what are those things called?"

"What?"

"Those black plastic things they put around your wrists."

"You mean Zip Ties?'

"See. I can't even think of the words."

He couldn't imagine surviving something like that. But if anyone could, it would be his sister.

She choked out a few words and then started again. "It was like a bad dream. Like I was drowning or something. I tried so hard to fight him off but it was so fuckin' horrible. Like I was blacking out. I could hardly move my arms."

"You didn't see him? His face or anything?"

She shook her head, eyes downcast. "Not til I woke up in this weird..." Her eyes glistened.

"Brick!" Skyden said from the doorway.

He jumped.

"Come on. Let your sister get some rest."

He got up.

"How much rest do I need?" said Kelsey. "I can't just lay in my bed all day. I'm totally losing it."

"The doctor said you need time to recover."

"I can't even talk to my little brother?"

He cracked a small smile when she called him her little brother.

"Of course you can," she said gently. "But we don't want to upset you. That's all."

She nodded. "Yeah. Okay." She rubbed her nose like she was holding back tears. "Sorry I freaked you guys out yesterday."

"You didn't freak us out."

"You freaked me out," said Brick.

"It's those pills. I'm not taking them anymore."

"You could cut back," said Skyden. "Maybe only take—"

"No. I'm so done with them. I can't even think."