CARDIGAN, acotar ¹

chapter forty five

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CHAPTER FORTY FIVE

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SAINT OR SINNER?

killer or victim; innocent or guilty; pure or tainted.

carson didn't know who she was anymore — what she had become. she could only stare in silence down at her hands. the blood had long been washed away, but she could feel the burden scarring her skin.

killer, guilty, tainted — it was all too clear now, a fresh new sense of reality that carson would hate forever.

her mind was too quiet, while loud eerie melodies echoed throughout the throne room — a small celebration in honor of her. still, she remained in the same stance and corner ever since she was dragged into cavern — unable to move, to speak. even as the dead screamed at her from the earth beneath her feet.

she felt ... numb.

carson thought of the soft-hearted faerie; his forgiving smile and gentle words. to the brutal glare of the female as she refused to cower. then at last, the tears of hope sliding down the human's pale cheeks.

she trembled, treading all too carefully on the line of sanity. breathe, she willed herself. so in the darkness of the corner, she wrestled for control until her head went light and her vision blurred until she became dizzy.

the guards snickered, hearing her shallow breaths.

but then one by one, they straightened, and carson felt her chest tighten as she found amarantha stalking toward her.

and yet, carson was too tired to care.

"don't look so miserable, carson," she said as she sipped on a crystal glass of blood red wine. "you're ruining my ball."

carson just leveled her stare, holding a lifetime of anger within her gaze.

amarantha just smiled wider, her white teeth flashing under the faerie-lights. she could have sworn they flickered. carson flinched when amarantha stepped closer, going so far to extend a hand to twirl a strand of her hair.

"you know," amarantha mused darkly, with a bittersweet smile that would haunt carson until her grave, "after your fourth task, i was beginning to think we had nothing in common. that you would give up and let me bless you with a quick death." she tugged her hair slightly until it hurt. still, carson did not say anything. "but after today? my darling, you were willing to kill three innocents."

carson wished she had a dagger in her hand. so that she might thrust it into amarantha's chest — then her own.

"you're so blind to see what is happening, aren't you, pet? you are willing to destroy yourself for your sister, for the world. but it's the fate of saviors, carson. you give, and you give — and what do you get?"

carson ground her teeth.

"well?" amarantha pressed, smiling viciously.