[WIP] Nick and Charlie: Future Years (a Heartstopper Story)

3. Nick

9:40 AM, April 27th- the day of the birthday party

TW: self body shaming, and anxiety attack

 I woke up, alone in Charlie's bed. I felt cold. I looked around the room, still laying down.

"Char?" I sat up and felt like crying.

I got up and walked towards his mirror. I looked at myself, touching my belly, with a sense of disgust.

"Does he even like this..." I looked at my slightly chunky body.

I wiped my tears and went downstairs. I saw Charlie outside, talking and laughing with his friends. 

I just sat down on the couch.

I don't think I've ever felt this way before. I've never cared about my body image.

I just looked for wedding suit ideas on Pinterest. Next month, I thought.

I went into the bathroom. I heard the front door close. Shit. I kept thinking to myself.

"Nick?" I heard his voice.

 "Bathroom!" I just said so he didn't worry.

He didn't bother, which sort of relieved me. I kept getting random racing thoughts.

He never liked you. David.

Oh, you're gay?  Dad.

You just have to be happy. Mum.

You took my life away from me, Nicholas!  Tori.

I started crying. I didn't care if Charlie caught me at this point, I needed a hug.

Of course, with his perfect timing, he knocked on the door. I hid in the corner of the bathtub, curled in a ball, sobbing more than ever.

"Nick?" He sounded worried.

"Come in," I whispered.

He opened the door and looked at me. He sat next to me and wrapped his arm around me.

Gently rubbing my shoulder, he just stayed quiet for a moment, letting me cry. I cried louder. At this point it was a bawl.

I felt so stupid. This was happening on his birthday.

"I'm sorry, this is happening on the day you're supposed to be happy." I leaned into his shoulder.

"Shh..." He hugged me.

"I just... feel like I'm gonna be a terrible husband." I lied. I didn't feel like telling him the truth right now. I will later.

"You'll be the most perfect husband ever. It'll take some time, but we'll figure it out.

 "Everything will be alright."

He kissed the side of my head, above my ear. I smiled slowly.

"We're gonna go play some games. Come on." He smiled.

I stood up as he dragged me out of the room. I smiled weakly.

"Hey, Nick." Tao looked at me.

"Hi,"

I looked at Charlie and smiled as he got blindfolded for pin the tail on the horse.

I immediately sat back down on the couch. A sudden migraine hit me. I groaned quietly.