Peter Pan by PHOENIX GAMES - Pico ft. Tom

🍿Let's Watch🍿

{^The cartoon Pico and Tom were watching for reference^}

Tom: "So anyway, out of absolutely nowhere, our quote-unquote 'hero' of the story emerges in possibly the most unsettling way imaginable. Looking like he just murdered the parents and is ready to eat the children. Peter Pan decides to..."

Narrating Bastard: "Creep up to their window and sit down on the sill..."

Tom: "For literally no reason at all. And this happens."

The One of The Kids I Guess: "Gee, Peter. You really exist."

[Awkward Silence]

Pico: "Um, hello? Hello? Did Mr. Narrator fall asleep?"

Narrating Bastard: "There was no-"

Pico: "Aha! No, here we go! Look at how ecstatic everyone is. They're so happy, the rocking horse won't stop rocking, and the ball won't stop bouncing. Oh joyous day, callooh ca-FUCKING-lay!"

Narrating Bastard: "There was no end to the great joy."

Tom: "Are you actually shitting me?! Pico, what the fuck is going on?!"

Pico: "I don't know, man! Don't ask me!"

Tom: "Were the animators actually making this film at the same time the narrator was speaking, and they were waiting for his next cue in order to carry on?"

Pico: "I don't know. I mean, with this horrid animation quality, you wouldn't be blamed for thinking that."

Tom: "Oh my god, we're still waiting! Help!"

Pico: "Oh, thank the heavens above, we're moving. What's on your mind then, Lady Death?"

Some Random Girl: "Look, Peter."

Pico: "Ha! Flawless little girl voice acting there, matey!"

Some Random Girl: "You've left your shadow and Tinkerbell outside the window"

Pico: "This is wrong on so many levels, in fact, there's more wrong in this then there is hiding in granny's bread."

[The girl's mouth continues to move without any voiceover]

Tom: "Pico, can we please stop watching this? I can't do this."

[Pico then goes on this rant, but ironically, his mouth just moves without any voiceover]

Tom: ..."Oh"

🅱eter 🅱an: "My shadow is very stubborn, and keeps running all the time."

Tom: "But wait, you just said you were sorry for leaving him locked outside. I've never watched anything so heinous, but within under three minutes, literally everything single line either doesn't work, doesn't make sense, or contradicts a few seconds before it. Were they making this up as they went along?"

Pico: "I don't know. But at least the characters all don't look like the shadow here. And, hey, they're following the base story I guess. I mean, look, the girl is sowing Peter's shadow onto him. This is good, right?"

Tom: "You mean Wendy?"

Pico: "Well, Phoenix Games assumes that I know the story of Peter Pan inside out because they literally don't tell you anything, so no, she is just 'girl'."

Tom: "Oh, right. Um, how did they get that this wrong?"

Pico: "I don't know."

Tom: "Wait, why are we whispering?"

Pico: "BECAUSE PHOENIX GAMES DON'T DESERVE MY REGULAR SPEAKING VOLUME!"

[Later]

Pico: "Either way, Peter decides to make the kids fly immediately. No reason. No point. I'm lost. And I'm a boy. A lost boy. PETER PAN REFERENCE!"