What Feelings Are

chapter one

PUSHING the cart as my mom looked at the aisles figuring what she was making for dinner tonight should be boring but I was starving so I was intrigued. "So... what are you thinking Mom?" I asked as I looked between her and the aisle.

She looked back at me and frowned, and I couldn't help but look at her amazing eyebrows. My mother was the prime example of gorgeous with her long dark hair that I inherited, her hazel eyes filled with warmth and wisdom, and she had a beauty mark right on top of her full lips. I wished to look like her when I was 37.

"I'm thinking.." She replied guilty. "that you should consider going to school at Augustine Prep, Mel." She says enthusiastically.

I rolled my eyes. She's still talking about this? Augustine Prep was nothing but a bunch of rich assholes flaunting their wealth and nice cars in your face. However, they did have a nice volleyball program that my mom keeps going on about.

"Mom, I already told you Layton is decent, and I like most of my teammates on the team" I groaned, pushing the cart. Layton was the public high school I attended, in LA it was considered to be a bad school but, hey, it was decent to me. Considering it's the end of the summer, and school started back up in a week, I'm about to start my senior year so maybe I should start thinking about the opportunities volleyball could bring me.

"Plus you know we can't afford that school, Mom." I said, making my point.

My mom smiles at me in a way like it's my birthday and reaches into the Micheal Kors purse that I bought her for Mother's Day. "I found this in the mail this morning" She waves the envelope like there's a million bucks inside.

Shittt I hope there is. "The coach on the team saw the video and application I sent of your volleyball match against that St. Peters school and offered you a full scholarship just so you can join his team!" Mom grinned.

"Are you serious?" I say in shock. People were looking at us in the aisle we were in but I ignored them. "When did you send in my video.. how.. what.." I looked at the letter and read what it said.

Dear Ms. Sanchez, we are pleased to accept your admission and want to offer you a full scholarship to join our St. Augustine Girls Volleyball Team... it goes on about the school and the admission process.

I looked back up at Mom in shock and she just smiled brightly at me "This could bring so many opportunities baby and I know what you said-" I cut her off by giving her the biggest hug I could. She hugs me back immediately.

"I know you probably sent the most embarrassing email ever" I muffled laughing into her shoulder. I pulled back to see her laughing adoringly at me. "Of course I did, I want to see you win.. always." She said warmly as moved my dark curls, out my face.

"Okay come on let's get takeout to celebrate, I don't feel like cooking." Mom laughs and starts putting the cart back.

                                                                            ++++++++++

After we get back home, I'm lying on my bed scrolling on my phone looking up the St. Augustine's School Instagram page.

Wow, the school is loaded... I think to myself as I scroll. I find myself on the school athletics page and see the basketball, soccer, and football. They won all of their school championships last year. The girl's and boys' volleyball hadn't won a trophy in 3 years. Hmph..

My laptop starts ringing, I look over and see my dad calling on Skype. I run over to my desk to press the green button to accept as I sit in my chair.

My dad's face lit up when he saw me on his screen "Hey Mel, what's poppin'?" Dad smiles jokingly. He's wearing his military uniform and I could see some guys in the back in the same attire also talking to loved ones.

"Hey pops, nothing much. What's popping over there?" I say jokingly a smile coming to my face.

"You know same old, same old, Sammy over just be annoying and annoying.." Dad rolls his eyes jokingly looking over to his friend, also known as my godfather.

"Hey, your dad's over here just busting my balls every day, Save me, Mel." He shoots back, his face pushing in front of the camera.

"Don't talk about balls in front of my daughter." Dad scowls at him.

I laugh at them, "Did they make you shave your head again Uncle Sammy?" I say as I see him rocking a fade making him look way older than he is. Uncle Sammy and my dad met when they were 24, they were on a tour in Afghanistan. They're both 38 now.

"Unfortunately, they're doing me so dirty here kid." He sighs dramatically shaking his head.

My dad pushes him out of the camera "Go talk to your wife moron."

"Tell Anna, I said hi." I smile before he leaves.

"She told me to tell you she doesn't really like you." he says off camera feigning sadness.

"Oh please she probably likes me more than you, moron." I jokingly shot back.

"You both are evil human beings." Uncle Sammy yelled back sounding far away from the camera.

My dad laughs at him, his eyes wrinkling in the corners, and looks back at me and nods his head at me. "Where's your mom?"

"Uh, I think she's downstairs or in her room? Do you want me to go get her?" I said ready to get up from my seat.

"No, it's fine Mel, I'll call her later," He says smiling. My dad and mom were high-school sweethearts, so they've been in love for as long as I can remember. They got pregnant with me at a young age but they loved me with all their heart.

"How's school?" Dad says.

"Good.." I wait, wanting to tell him about my scholarship. "I..uh got a scholarship for volleyball at St. Augustine." I say.

"Melanie! That's amazing!" Dad said excitedly. "Why didn't you tell me you applied?" He frowned.

"I didn't apply... " I scoffed "Mom sent one of my games to coach there and I guess he liked what he saw." I shrugged.

"That woman..." he smiles lovingly thinking about Mom. "Of course, he liked what he saw, You're extremely talented Melania." He said calling me by my full name to let me know he was serious.

"Thanks, Dad." I smile warmly at him "When do you think you're coming back?" I say hopefully.

He grinned at me knowingly, "In two weeks."

"No way! That soon? Oh my god! Does mom know?" I say smiling in shock.

"I wanna tell her so shh." He puts a finger to his lips and looked over his shoulder.
"Listen, I gotta go, tell your Mom to be on the lookout for when I call her."

"Okay, for sure." I said.

"I love you, Mel, I know I won't be there for the first day but kick-ass okay?" He says sternly.

"Okay, I will." I laugh lightly. "I love you too dad."

The call ends. "Mom!" I run downstairs.

Authors Note
I hope you guys enjoyed the first chapter! It's short ikk I'm sorry, I just wanted to get the beginning. I have so much more in store. Stay tuned :)