Looked up in the sky and wondered if you were searching for the moon, thinking about me. Wonder if you still consider me a light in the darkness, if I'm even worthy of that title. Wonder if you call her that, and see me when you close your eyes and say it. Do you think of me? I can't get you out of my head. He was really just a distraction because this- being alone and without you -is worse than I ever thought it could be. I'm not crying in pain and fear like I was at 16, but instead tearing up at lost connection, a drop on a picture because I ache for someone I can't and probably won't be able to be with, constant thoughts running because I remember and I can't help it but what if and what would've happened and scenarios play out in my head wishing it could be different. I long for you. Your soul, your heart. I wish I could have the honor of having it again. I wish I could look you in the eyes and see myself through your eyes and know if this is gone for good or not. I'm so torn. I shouldn't be, but I don't think I can help it. I'm back to square one, searching for the moon and hoping you are too.
