The first morning of my Senior Year is, as expected, awful.
It's not like I got any sleep last night, which is standard by now, but it never felt this tiring.
Javi's absence settles over me even heavier, and the idea of going to school and seeing him makes me not want to leave my bed. Ever.
I debate picking up my phone and lose every last ounce of self-respect by texting him like every other school day. To give this one last try and pretend we're good. Just send my signature Poop-GIF.
I know he went on his regular morning jog; being the petty person I am, I non-accidentally looked outside my bedroom window when it was time for him to run around 6 AM. He is unbearable like that, a morning person in all his perfect annoyance. I used to be part of his annoying life until he decided he didn't want me anymore.
No, no longer. Time to end this pity party and feeling sorry for myself until I'm back from the first day at least.
I push my blanket away with too much force, knocking my hand on the wall. The pain of my stupidity helps me to refocus. I am pushing Javi-related thoughts out. I wouldn't allow myself any more reaching out. I tried.
I tried and failed, so no longer.
I open my phone and swipe through social media, desperate for some distraction.
You have a life, Nate, I tell myself. I see some of my friends posting about their excitement about entering their last year, and I take a deep breath. I'm part of that too. Only one more year, and I will thankfully never have to see any of them again.
Since the only person who has made school life for me bearable all these years is painfully unavailable, I will have just to grit my teeth—only one more year. Time to put on a mask and get this year over with.
Time to share my misery and get my acting performance going. After quickly getting dressed and washing my face, I put on the obnoxious Pharrell Williams Song and open the two-bedroom doors facing each other. The twins are so going to love me.
"GOOD MORNING, SUNSHINES!" I yell. " NEW YEAR, NEW MONDAY, SAME LOVE FOR WAKING UP EARLY, AM I RIGHT?"
I am receiving loud groans in response as I loudly stomp down the stairs to the kitchen. It is an improvement from last year's death threats, though they were very creative, I have to admit.
After the song ended and I did not clap my hands because I was still anything but happy, I turned the phone off and prepared breakfast instead. The first day of school calls for special back-to-school pancakes.
Right as I put the toppings on our kitchen counter, two grumpy figures slump down.
"Love to see that you're still as motivated to start your morning as ever," I say sweetly.
"I hate you just a little right now," Emmaline grumbles out, eyes still half-closed.
"Thanks for trying not to insult me right away," I wink at her and shovel pancakes on their plates.
The smell works in my favor; Em looks like they're inhaling the sweetened air, and to my delight, letting out a much more content groan than twenty minutes ago. The twins are pouring each other their favorite sauces, chocolate for Em and raspberry for Emmaline, and I move behind Emma.
Between mouthfuls of pancakes, she asks, "Did you make this?".
I untangle the mess of her hair and put it in a neat ponytail, careful not to miss any strands this time, and top it with Emma's signature bow. After years of living with their long hair, YouTube became my go-to platform. You can learn literally anything on there. It's impressive and scary; after I watched a DIY for Molotov Cocktails during a rabbit hole (at a very ungodly hour), I knew I had to stop. But hair tutorials? Amazing. No matter what kind of hair you have, you can find fifteen cute summer styles that take less than three minutes. Long live YouTube, the adviser for socially awkward people who want to avoid asking actual people.
YOU ARE READING
Everest, untitled.
Teen FictionSmile. Pretend to belong. And never, EVER raise suspicion. Your family depends on it. Everest Nathan "Nate" Decker is barely hanging on, desperate to hold on to the few fires in his life he can control. Being the teacher's pet, designated driver...