Desesperada

Chapter 1 - The Actions I Interpreted

~Yara's POV~

An alleyway.

Why do I always run away like this?

Toni likes being "friendly," but he's been going too far lately.

No, there's no way he likes me. It's always "best friend this" and "best friend that" stuff.

He'll never see me in the same way I see him.

Ugh, he just friend-zones me so hard!

Right now, I'm being useless. Toni was considerate, but I dared to run away from his kindness. Now, I'm just sitting here, head buried in my legs. This is no way to say thank you.

Oh. I can feel him walking this way. The ground is shaking in the same pattern he strolls. I don't feel like running away from him further...

~Antonio's POV~

The streets near where Yara is hiding.

I love her.

The way she tenses up when I do weird things– heh, I love teasing her.

Yet, I still keep using the same excuse of "best friendship." Hmm, I wonder when I should tell her.

Maybe I should wait until she says something. Well, she doesn't talk, though.

Her finger is soft. The ice cream just enhances– oh, there she is.

~Yara's POV~

Yara and Antonio meet at the alleyway.

Ah, he found me.

"Hey. I'm sorry if I startled you," Toni apologized.

I lifted my head wearily, tears welling up in my eyes.

I just stared at him.

Suddenly, he sat beside me on the ground.

"I-I'm not good at empathizing, so I'm not sure what to say. Sorry for making you cry, Yara. I'll just walk you home for today."

He reached out his hand and helped me up.

Heh, I get to hold his hand again.

I tried to let go of his hand after I got up, but he started tightly squeezing it, so I couldn't escape at that point. This is so embarrassing!

"I won't let you go until we arrive at your house."

I just felt my face burning after that.

"C-Come on, Toni, I'm not a kid!"

"This is part of my apology, though."

I just felt even more heat come to my face.

Then, we just continued the rest of the walk in silence.

2 hours later.

Yara's bedroom. Antonio has already dropped off Yara and left.

Hmm, I have room to think now.

What the heck just happened today?!
In the afternoon, Toni and I were just having our regular one-sided chats, but that ice cream place...

It was so embarrassing when that ice cream spilled all over my hands.

Moreover, I could feel the strength of Toni's own hands when he was wiping those napkins on my hands.

I love hands.

I love his hands, especially.

Then– he ate the extra ice cream off that one finger! If he does that again, I might just faint from excitement.

Still, he says it's all because we are besties. I can't believe him! What an idiot! Why can't he see... Why is he so idiotic he can't see...

...that I love him?

Why am I so desperate?

Why can't I make myself useful?

It's always Toni doing everything for me.

Why can't I do anything for myself?
All I can do is lay here on my bed and cry while imagining my extra pillow as a person as I embrace it.

I think I'm more idiotic than him.
Then, I fell asleep with forlorn tears staining the pillow cover.

What an idiot.