𝑆𝑢𝑛

.

Some things hurt.

And will probably always hurt, until my very last heartbeat.

Sometimes it hangs above our head like a guillotine, and I was trying to prepare myself, because I knew, for the past few months I knew it was a matter of weeks, or even days.

But I guess there's things your heart will never be ready for.

The last time it happened, it was brutal, a raw and burning pain that still aches when the stars are shining so bright and prettily in the night.

It was an agonizing pain, a part of me that I gladly gave the day he left, because as much as it hurted, I would rather leave with him, knowing that he wasn't alone than trying to keep my heart whole.

But, today, with you leaving, it's pure... numbness.

The realization that now I have none of my little angels left break me to a point that it's not even painful.

It's pure and simple emptiness and loneliness.

Before today I never realized that you were the last one.

At the end I lost everyone.

I remember when I first saw you, four years ago, so hyperactive that you couldn't stay still and kept trying to escape.

Then you were litteraly running away from me.

For so long I thought that you disliked being here with me, so I just... sat. I sat there, hugging my little star and you were watching us from afar.

And then slowly you calmed down, and every time I was so proud of you for letting us take care of you, for over an hour at the end, without moving a single ear.

I was euphoric, full of joy and pride.

Knowing you was one of the purest form of trust that I ever felt.

I can't believe that the same horse I was struggling to even approaches, is the same than the one who came running to me at the sound of my voice.

It's breaking my heart with so much violence and yet it's so full of love.

I'm so glad and grateful that I got to know you, thank you for making my life a little bit brighter.

I'll forever love you, and on your way to the stars, please say hi to everyone for me, tell them I still love them.

At least now you're all reunited, and I'm sure you all became the prettiest constellation in the sky.

Sleep tight, farewell my shining Sun.

☆

It's not proofread, it's just (sad) rant, it probably doesn't even make sense but who cares.