Loving Against the Grain (Into the West #2)

Chapter 8

The morning after Emmaline accepted Noah Lawson’s abrupt proposal, she woke as usual to the dry heaves of her very familiar morning sickness. Feeling sick as a dog for the morning hours had become a ritual Emmie could very easily do without, but to which she’d resignedly become accustomed.

Dragging around her room preparing to dress for the day, she paused intermittently to gag and heave over the large wash basin Edward had provided for just that purpose. After the last bout, Emmie stared at herself in the looking glass, taking note of her dull eyes, even duller hair, and pale skin. If she hadn’t known she was pregnant, she would have thought she was dying from some slow, debilitating disease. Pregnancy did not agree with her. The only blossoming parts of her were her breasts. Right now, as she stood before the mirror, Emmaline could see how tight the bodice of her dress appeared, how it pulled across the offending bosoms, and she sighed, face reddening. How embarrassing! Always full-chested, Emmaline now felt like a milk cow late for the milking, and hated the idea of serving the loggers, leaning across them with her chest in their faces! How could they not notice?

Tugging at the waistline of her calico dress, pulling the snug material down, Emmaline slipped her arms into the full, white apron, glad at least that that garment disguised her shape somewhat. But she was slowly filling that out, as well.

Unbidden tears welled to the surface, as Emmie succumbed to another bout of self-pity at her plight, crying over the basin even as she retched once more into the bowl. How low she had stooped! No more carefree days of flirting with the loggers, stepping out to walk the river with a dashing sea captain, or go riding in a field of wildflowers and stopping for a picnic under the singing redwoods. Oh, no! Now she could look forward to marriage with a veritable stranger, living in his yet-unseen abode, caring for his wants and needs, and growing as big as a house, too! And after the baby came, she’d be a slave to that little tyrant, as well! Wiping her streaming eyes and drooling mouth, Emmaline growled deep in her throat and ruthlessly began tying her hair back into a spinsterish bun, cruelly jabbing pins into it as if she were stabbing some ferocious beast. It just wasn’t fair!

“Emmie?” The familiar knock came on her bedroom door. “Breakfast is ready.”

Stomping away from the looking glass, Emmaline yanked open her door and glared at her brother, who fell back from the opening at her vicious action.

 “How many times do I have to tell you, Eddy? I can’t eat anything!”

Edward rolled his eyes at his idiotic faux pas, mumbling a, “Sorry. I forgot,” as apology. He watched with sad eyes as his sister snatched up the covered basin and stomped down the stairs to toss its contents outside. He’d slept better, knowing Emmaline and her situation had a beneficial solution for all concerned, but obviously the person most affected had not become resigned to the fact yet. Following her more slowly down the stairs, Edward wished his baby sister could accept the fact her life was changing forever with this one careless act she’d committed. It resembled the ripples left when a rock is thrown into a pond; he and Noah Lawson stood on the outer circles of those ripples, slowly being drawn in against their wills.

After emptying the wash basin’s contents, leaving it lolling on the grass beside the back stoop to be gathered on her return home, Emmaline tied her little white bonnet over that schoolmarm knot of hair and turned to her brother.

 “How long do I have?” She blurted, glaring at him as if he were to blame for her situation. Not pretending to misunderstand her query, Edward picked up the sandwich he’d made for his noon repast and replied, wrapping it slowly in newsprint, “Maybe two weeks. I’ve gotta ride over to Camas to telegraph the circuit preacher. Don’t want that news getting around here in St. Helens. It’ll take a little time for them to send someone out this way, so I’m guessing a couple of weeks.”