𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 / 𝐈𝐕.

VI.

a decision

SLOWLY, I force my mouth open to accept the food. The sweet, citrus smell tickling my nose as the sun seeps through my skin. With each small bite, each received taste of the orange, I feel better. Almost as if my body is psychically unknotting itself while Edward and I sit on the back of the jeep. His head is tilted away from the sun, the ball cap hiding his eyes from the light as he waits for me to finish.

Our drive back from Seattle to Forks has been slow, requiring stops to ease my stomach and allow me to stretch. I hadn't realized just how much of a physical toll a pregnancy could be until now. Four weeks in and I'm already miserable.

"Good to know the only things you can keep down are citrus and meat," Edward comments, stealing a glance up through the pines. The lone rest stop holds a sense of familiarity Alaska lacked. And despite the circumstances that have made me return home, I'd rather be here.

I nod in reply, looking over at the cardboard container that held the remnants of my burger. Discarded tomatoes and lettuce that my stomach detested.

"I'm sorry this is why you're coming home, Heather." He says and I pause my consumption of the clementine. "None of this is fair to you, to your body."

We've been silent about the actuality of the situation, afraid to speak our horrors into reality. Who knew what would be waiting for us from Carlisle's exam? Would there actually be a baby? Or just the monster that's haunted my recent nightmares?

"I'm fucking terrified, Edward." I look up at him, my voice trembling ever so slightly. "I thought this was impossible, unattainable. The chance of starting and having my own family was gashed when I made the promise to become a vampire. So yeah, I'm scared shitless but we have a chance at something we thought we could never have. We could be having a baby, having our own family."

His gaze shifts down to the cracked concrete, focused on the weeds growing up from between the stone. "I'm scared too, Heather. I'm worried about what will happen to you with this if your body can't handle this. What if we can't get the venom in your bloodstream in time?"

"But what if I make it through? What if I can survive in time? Edward?" I question, taking his hand in mine and begging that he'd look over me.

"I want this, I want a family with you Heather. It's all I could want at this moment." Edward slowly responds, squeezing my hand. In this moment, suspended in time I feel sure. The future is so terrifying, who knows what'll happen to us with this? But there's a security I've lacked in the past; willingly, I'm diving into the unknown.

Closing the distance between us, I wrap my arms around his neck and his arm falls to my waist. In the intimate embrace, we kiss and share the same desires.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The machine hums in my ears, gray overcast dimming the room as Carlisle checks my vitals. Trying my hardest not to shift, the blood pressure cuff is tight against my forearm as we try to make sense of it all.

When we returned in the evening, Edward's siblings had been forced out of the house by Esme. Leaving the three of us in Carlisle's office free to be, and to breathe. I'd felt the tension through the house the moment we'd stepped out of the car. Rosalie's fleeting glance at me as she'd hurried away was like daggers and as quiet as Jasper tried to be, I could hear his disapproval of the situation.

"Just a bit longer, Heather," Carlisle assures me with a light tap on the shoulder. I look over to Edward who is sitting still across the room from me. He offers a grimace instead of a smile when his father announces that my blood pressure is running a bit high, and my heart and lungs working hard in my chest.

"What does that mean for me?" I ask, unfamiliar with all of this. My medical knowledge is limited to first aid, I don't know how this affects the pregnancy.

"It's hard to say, most likely because of the unique infusion of human and vampire DNA, your body is working harder to supply blood to the fetus. But, that's just what I can assume." Carlisle says, still dejected over the inconsistent results my sonogram had revealed. The placenta is too thick to see the growing organism.

"They're draining her?" Edward speaks up, standing from his chair and joining me.

"I believe so."

"Carlisle, I can't just take I think so. This is my child we're talking about. We need more concrete answers." It's clear Edward's frustrations are growing alongside mine. I knew this situation would be complicated, but I feel completely blindsided.

"Trust me, son. I do too, but I've never seen anything like this before. All of this is a medical mystery to me." Carlisle rubs the bridge of his nose, all the centuries he'd spent studying medicine had never prepared him for a situation like this.

"But we know someone who might." I perk up at Edward's comment, curious for any answers I might find.

"No, I can't ask them to do this. We'd be putting a target on their back for the Volturi." His father shoots back, pulling off his latex gloves in frustration and throwing them away.

"Carlisle, please. You told me decades ago you'd do anything for your children. I need you to hold to that promise for the sake of our child." Edward's hands come to rest on top of my shoulders, his tone firm as he speaks against his father. It's apparent there's someone who might be able to help, and I'll take any chance I can get.

"She would never come, Edward. Even if I asked." Carlisle responds, shaking his head in defeat. But before Edward can argue back, the glass door to the balcony swings open, and Alice pops in a knowing grin on her face.

"I wouldn't be so quick to assume that, Carlisle. I'll convince them to come." She proudly announces, trying her hardest to stand tall as short as she is. The three Cullens stand in silence, like a Western movie stand-off I'd watch with my grandfather, I'm waiting for someone to pull the trigger.

So I finally do, speaking up for myself. "Is anyone going to tell me what the fuck is going on?"