Sidemen Oneshots

Yellow Card

Based on a moment from the MoreSidemen video 'SIDEMEN PATIENCE TEST: KSI EDITION'.

Vik knows, before he's even hit the call button, that JJ is going to start grumpily calling him a tattletale for the next two months. Minimum.

Oh well, at least it'll be worth it, he thinks before actually clicking the call button on his phone, feeling a tad more frustrated as he listens to JJ bicker aggressively with Harry on the other end of their call.

Headphones off and phone held out on speaker, Vik patiently waits the few rings it takes for the other man to pick up, feeling only partially guilty for disturbing the eldest at this late hour. He wouldn't mind, he tells himself. Besides, it's highly unlikely he'll so much as think about going to sleep at any point in the next few hours.

"Hello?"

"Ah, Josh," Vik greets immediately, his words purposely projected loud enough to catch JJ's attention. He smiles when the other swears in response to the realisation of what's happening. "We have a sort of favour to ask of you."

"A favour? At this time of night?," a pause and then, "What kind of favour?"

Josh's tone is amused and slightly elevated, just enough that it's obvious what he's hinting at. Vik ignores Harry's appalled gasp of, "Dirty bugger!" in favour of continuing on his mission to get JJ what he deserves.

"So, as you know, Harry, Ethan, JJ and I are currently recording a MoreSidemen video, yes?" Vik waits for the answering, "Yes," which is surely accompanied by a nod, before resuming. "JJ here keeps ruining the game for all of us. Apparently he doesn't know what teamwork is and keeps trying to sabotage us. He's completely messing the video up."

"And the favour is... what?" Josh asks, his voice filled with entertained perplexity. "You want me and Simon to give him a yellow card for your troubles?"

"Yes!" Both Ethan and Harry scream at the same time, Ethan's with a deeper, angrier tone to it in comparison to Harry's emotionally exhausted scream. JJ has left all three of them feeling beyond exasperated.

There is some shuffling on the other end of the line, and then Simon's voice comes through, stern and no-nonsense. "End the call, Vik. We'll come talk to you all in person and just edit this bit out of the footage before we send it over to the editor."

Ethan can be heard cackling as Vik does as he's told, mocking JJ with a nasty tone in order to rub salt in the wound, "Ha! Get fucked, JJ. You're done for."

"Nah, what the fuck, man." JJ whines, suddenly feeling hard done by now that he's finally going to get what they've been threatening him with since the start of the recording over an hour ago. "You lot just DON'T KNOW HOW TO HAVE ANY FUN!"

When Ethan shoots back with, "We know how to have fun. You're just a dickhead sometimes, babe," JJ stays silent. His expression is gloomy, and he's pouting like he's just been slapped across the face.

Once all of their computers and cameras have been dealt with, the recording call ended, they all meet out in the hallway knowing they'll be expected to meet down in the living room. Except, Harry hasn't left his room for some reason as he's not out there with them.

"Where the fuck has he gone?" Ethan mutters, moving to peer into their youngest boyfriend's room. When he comes back out, there is a lighter look on his face, as well as a small smile. He rolls his eyes fondly as he tells them, "He's already gone."

Not a surprise to any of them, really. If JJ is about to get an austere talking to, then of course Harry would want to settle in first and assure Simon, Josh and Tobi that he's been as good as gold. If there is one thing that Harry despises, it's getting roped into punishments he's adamant he doesn't deserve, since its not his fault he got involved. Generally, those occasions only happened at the beginning of their relationship, nearly always when Ethan or JJ had hounded him past his limit and he ended up snapping at them, only to face repercussions for it later. Almost five years down the line, they're all in a better place: they're older, wiser, and more experienced. They therefore now exist in a happier, healthier, and more seamless relationship than they did all those years ago.